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My phone buzzes in my pocket.
“Aww. It’s from Barrett and Chloe.” I lift my phone is Jess’s direction so she can see the electronic birthday card they sent me.
I’ve been getting texts and calls all day, but nothing from Alec yet. I would imagine he’d still send me a birthday text; we were together for two and a half years.
Although he is casually dating an Instagram influencer named Brecken right now.
But, it’s super casual. That’s what he said when I ran into him last week at our gym. Not ‘our’ gym, but the gym we both go to.
Sometimes, I stare at that dining table and imagine Alec walking into my boutique to tell me he made a mistake. He was wrong for breaking up with me and that we should give it another try. It still doesn’t hurt any less, being dumped by the person you thought you were going to spend the rest of your life with. Then, watching them move on, casually or not.
“Are you thinking about the table again?” Jess asks.
“What? No.” I shake my head, but Jess knows me too well.
Alec used to tease me about being in love with love, but how can I not be? Isn’t it the most magical feeling in the world? And through my bridal gown designs, I get to see how that love is transformed into a union between two people that are going to spend the rest of their lives together. That’s my favorite part. That my gowns get to be part of someone’s memories on the most special day of their lives.
I want that. But I’m no closer to my special day than I was two years ago when Alec and I bumped into each other at the coffee shop between our apartments.
“Emma.” Jess pulls me out of my spiral. “Put it on.”
My gaze drops to my unsalvageable pink dress and I nod, knowing that as the minutes count down to the start of my show, I have no choice.
I turn to let Jess unzip my dress so I can shimmy out of it and quickly into Mr. Christian Dior. No one even bats an eye at my impromptu dress change as Jess starts to do up the buttons along the back.
“You don’t think it’s bad form to wear this now, do you?” I ask. “It’s not going to bring me bad luck if I need to wear it in the future?”In case Alec realizes he’s made the biggest mistake of his life, dumps Brecken and proposes to me?
I don’t have to say it out loud, Jess knows what I’m thinking. What I’m hoping for.
“Let’s not think about Alec right now. Tonight is about you and your hard work.”
“Everyone on the team’s hard work,” I interject.
“Right, but without you there is no Emma Belle Bridal, so get moving, missy.”
Jess swats at my butt to shoo me back toward the stage where I make it just in time to watch the first model step out onto the runway.
The venue is lit up with soft white lights that bounce off the shiny pink runway. The music, which is a classic bridal song remixed with an upbeat dance song, sets the perfect tone for the sophisticated, yet flirty gowns I have designed. While this isn’t my first collection, it’s the first that I’m showing to the world. My fingernail finds its way to my mouth automatically. It’s a bad habit that prevents me from keeping a decent manicure. Alec always thought it was gross. He could never understand why I couldn’t just quit biting them. Willpower, he said.
I see the buyers from Bloomingdale’s and Bergman’s. I watch anxiously as they point at the model walking by, then furiously write something down on their notepads, eyeing each other suspiciously before turning back to watch the next model advance. While I have always enjoyed designing custom pieces, and I have for some friends and social acquaintances, I love the idea of my gowns being available to the masses to shop in department stores and bridal boutiques across the country.
Anna, the model that I stitched into her dress, is the last one ahead of me. It is a bit funny to realize that the months and months of hard work have been for this two minute and twenty-six-second show.
When Anna makes her way back down the runway, the parade of models goes out again, and this time I follow. The audience is on their feet. At the sound of their applause, a wave of emotion hits me. It’s beyond thrilling to be following models down the runway that are wearing my designs. I nervously tuck a strand of my shoulder-length hair behind my ear and step out into the lights. My gown might be a tad much for my neutral makeup and casual hair, but the gorgeous vintage gown fits like a glove and gives me a boost of confidence as I attempt to stay upright on this shiny stage.
The audience applause is deafening and the lights are blinding. I smile and wave, doing my best to soak in this moment. For a moment, a twinge of sadness settles over me. None of the faces in the audience are familiar. All of the Emma Belle Bridal team is backstage and my mom and dad weren’t able to make it, their work schedules conflicting. I’d always imagined this moment with Alec in the audience cheering me on. But the reality is, even if we were still together, I’m not confident he would have shown up.
My gaze settles over the front row where the buyers from several department stores are seated. Their heads are down, pencils furiously jotting notes on the papers in their laps. I let the anticipation of hearing their feedback push my recently single status to the back of my mind.
The models finish their lap around the runway and I give a final wave and blow a kiss to the still cheering audience before disappearing backstage. My heart beating with excitement, I watch the models embrace each other, smiling and laughing. Then six sets of arms are embracing me. I take a breath, trying to calm down from the adrenaline rush of it all.
My phone buzzes. I expect to see another text or notification from a friend wishing me happy birthday. I scroll through the notifications.
Alec Mitchell has a new post.
I glance around, feeling guilty that I haven’t taken Jess’s advice and removed him from my contacts.
How can you move on if you’re constantly checking up on him?
