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I stop directly on top of his grave and ask Reece, “Can you give me some privacy?”
He throws me a strange look, but faces the other way.
I lower my leggings and underwear to my thighs, then squat with my feet as far apart as they’ll go. As soon as my stream hits the frigid, unforgiving earth, Reece spins right back around, staring down at me.
“Privacy, please.”
“Snow…” Thrusting a hand out in my direction, his eyes lift to the churning sky. “What are you doing?”
I raise my eyes skyward, too. “Relieving myself.”
“Why didn’t you tell me you had to go? I would’ve pulled off somewhere.”
“I’d rather piss on him.” I finish and stand, quickly covering myself before my ass gets frostbite. Thankfully Reece had an extra coat in his car that he insisted I wear, otherwise I’d be half frozen by now.
Reece drops his gaze to me again. “Him?”
“You wanted to know about the man I killed when I was sixteen.” I wave at the headstone.
“Aleksander Obuchowski,” Reece reads aloud. “Who was he?”
“My father.”
“You killed your… But I thought you said…”
“I never said Cyrus was my father. I said my name was Lexi Andeno, and it was. For a time.”
“He was your stepfather?”
“Temporary legal guardian. When I went to live with him at sixteen, he had my last name changed so everybody would know I was off-limits.” I cock my head. “Outside of The Playground anyway.”
Reece studies my father’s engraved name, a crease forming between his black eyebrows. “Tell me what he did to you or I’ll dig him up and get it out of him myself.”
I’m tempted to stay quiet just to watch him try. But then I’d have to see my dad—whatever’s left of him.
“I’m supposed to believe you keep a shovel with you when you don’t even carry a lighter?”
“You know what… Why don’t you give me a list of everything we might need before we leave the house next time? That way I’ll be better prepared for whatever you chose to do.”
He says it like we’re the married couple and this is a regular occurrence, like it could be—us leaving the same house together—and for a brief second, I let myself imagine what that’d look like. With Reece’s apartment still fresh in my memory, it’s easy to imagine our house. Sitting among his things, surrounded by his zesty, spicy scent, it was the closest I’ve ever felt to being home.
While my house is cold and insipid and untouched, his place is warm and cozy and lived in. I miss it already and I was barely in it.
We’re the hard part to wrap my head around because Reece and I… A marriage between us wouldn’t be anything like mine and Kordin’s. It’d be full. Of noise. Of passion. And I don’t know if I could turn a cheek to him cheating on me.
Would he cheat on me?
“Have you ever cheated on anyone?”
“What does cheating have to do with this?”
“Everything.” This starts with a cheater. And ends with a cheater.
I am my mother’s daughter.
Nodding, he tilts his head up. Tiny snowflakes flutter down around us, sparkling on their lazy descent, some of them sticking to Reece’s raven hair and eyelashes before melting completely.
I tug his coat tighter to my body.
