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“And I love you too,” she responded, handing me a plastic cup of water. “Even more now that I know you meant Holden. Drink that and take these pills.”
I reached blindly for the cup, holding one hand out palm-up, and lifted my head up just enough to drink the water and swallow the pills without choking. Max took the empty cup from my hand and walked back to the bathroom.
Just then, a fantastic idea came to me and I sat up. I bent over the bed to grab my clutch, popping open the snap closure and sliding out my phone.
“I’m going to text Holden andtellhim that I love him,” I announced confidently, trying and failing to enter the right passcode. “Or wait — maybe a call would be better for that sort of thing. Ugh, stupid phone, recognize my face!”
“No!” Maxine yelled, launching herself on top of me and wrestling the phone from my hand. “No phone for you until you sober up.”
“But I need to text him that I’m home sleeping with my bestie for the restie.”
“I’ll tell him we made it back to your place.” She typed in my passcode, her fingers flying across the screen. “There, done.”
“That’s why you’re the love of my life.” I dragged out the last word for emphasis.
“I’m telling you right now, I like to snuggle when I’m drunk, so don’t be surprised if you wake up and we’re spooning.”
“I would let you spoon me any day, drunk or sober, because I love you so much.” My lids were already closing. I yawned, feeling a gust of cool air on my back as Max slid under the covers.
Neither of us said a word as she slung her arm over my waist and tucked her cold feet beneath mine.
31
Max and I spent all of Sunday on my couch nursing hangovers. Apparently, Max’s ability to appear sober did not mean she didn’t get hungover. Still, she insisted all day long that she only felt bad because I’d kept her awake all night with my snoring, even though she dry-heaved when she saw the emergency bottle of wine in my fridge.
I ordered us breakfast to thank her for taking such good care of me after the party, and as a thank-you for not letting me drunkenly confess my love to Holden. I also pledged her my undying gratitude and firstborn child, but she said she’d settle for me getting rid of a few rodents since their squealing was making her non-hungover brain hurt. My confession was all she wanted to talk about, despite my assurances that nothing had happened. Nothing big anyway. These new feelings for Holden were like creeping ivy. One day it was just a little thing — not worthy of notice — and then, weeks or even months later, it’s spread so tall and thick it’s all you can see.
The first thing I had seen when I woke up — well, the second if you count Max’s drooling face on the pillow next to mine — were texts from Holden asking how I felt and to let him know I was still alive.
Our interactions since Sunday had all been via text, except for one quick phone call that hadn’t been nearly long enough to satisfy this new craving. By the time Wednesday rolled around, I missed him. I missed watching how expressive his face was if you knew what to look for. I missed cataloguing each of his smiles and the way his laughter seemed to surprise even him. I was so desperate that I decided I’d risk rejection and ask him to dinner. By text, though — hearing his voice while he rejected me required a level of bravery that I did not possess.
Me: Hi stranger, do you have plans for dinner tonight? I heard about a new food truck that I’ve been dying to try, and I know how much you love a good food truck.
I was going for a “casual invite” tone, but I was pretty sure I’d landed on “ramblings of an anxious person” instead. Oh well, Holden should know what he was getting into — if I could convince him that I was worth taking a risk on.
Holden: I’d love to grab dinner, but I’ll be in depositions all day today. I need to prepare for tomorrow’s round after, so I’ll be working late. I’m sorry.
Me: You don’t have to apologize, Holden! Did you eat today?
Holden: Not yet. I don’t even have time to grab another cup of coffee.
Me: :o(
I checked the time on my phone. It was close enough to noon to take lunch.
“I’m going out for lunch,” I announced to Jin and Max, opening the bottom desk drawer to grab my purse. “Holden’s got a really busy day, so I’m going to drop off some coffee for him.”
Max and Jin looked at me like I’d sprouted another head while talking.
“What?” I asked, looking behind me to see if I’d missed something.
“This is a thing now?” Max replied, eyebrows almost to her bangs. “You and Holden bringing each other coffees?”
“Are they dating?” Jin asked, head swiveling between Max and me for confirmation.
“No, we’re not dating, and no, it’s not a thing.” I shrugged, once again going for casual. “We’re just friends, and friends can do nice things for each other.”
“Right.”
