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I had to leave them in that moment, because even though my body was completely spent from Ryker’s touch and Emmett’s gaze, they were bringing me back to life all over again.
Maybe Axel is right, maybe I am a whore. I’ve never acted like this in my entire life. Making sure to keep my legs closed at the Reapers, and only finding solace in the odd guy here and there on a night out.
No one has ever asked me deep questions, or been interested in my wants and desires, but here I am, giving it to them on a plate. If that makes me a whore, then sign me up, because I’ve never felt more empowered in my life.
If anyone from the Ice Reapers saw me now, they wouldn’t believe it, and that leaves me even more exhilarated. The only issue that remains is where I align myself with the Ruthless Brothers or the Devil’s Brutes.
They’re dangerous. A darkness I thought I had managed to escape, but I should have heeded my own warning when I first mentioned them to the brothers.
Startled by my thoughts, my eyes blink open at the sound of my bedroom door swinging open. The panic that instantly bubbles to the surface quickly dies when I see it’s Emily in the doorway.
“Don’t fucking do that, you scared the shit out of me,” I grumble, not moving from my spot on the bed as I try to calm my breathing. If she notices my discomfort, she doesn’t mention it as she moves to take a seat beside me, leaving the door open for Duffer to come in too.
My eyebrows pinch for a moment as I stare at him. This is the first time there’s been a guy in my room since I got here and he’s most definitely not one of the ones I would be excited about. He also doesn’t feel like a threat though, so I opt to let him stay without kicking up a fuss.
If Emmett trusts him with Emily, he must be safe enough to be around without being a raging asshole. I hope.
“I’ve been looking for you, but I didn’t think you would be hiding away in here when it’s so nice outside,” she states, quirking her brow at me in exaggeration. She’s wearing a pale blue crewneck sweater and a pair of ripped jeans, no hint of skin revealing that it is actually warm outside, but I don’t call her out on it.
“With deep and dark intent, the killer used acid to burn the remains in the bathtub…”
“What the fuck are you listening to?” Duffer asks, leaning against the chest of drawers with his arms folded across his chest.
“It’s just a podcast,” I mumble, reaching for my cell phone and switching it off.
“It sounds to me like you were getting ideas and storing them away for a later date,” he replies with a grin, waggling his eyebrows at me suggestively, and I smirk.
“You wouldn’t believe the shit I’ve learned from these things, but you can try me if you like.”
His smile quickly drops and his Adam's apple bobs, making my smile grow wider. “I’m good. Thanks.” His short and clipped response makes Emily chuckle beside me, lighting the room around us, and I quickly laugh along with her.
“Are you going to come out of your cave and say hi? Maggie was asking where you are.”
I’d really rather not deal with the Ruthless Bitches and Axel right now, but I can’t say that out loud. Not when I’m supposed to be a whore and want all of that shit. Although, I don’t think Emily or Maggie see me in that light at all.
I’m good at many things, but it’s apparent that pretending to be an entirely different person is beyond my reach. I can be myself, that’s it. This altered version of me, the sex and all, is still me, just a newer, improved version that I didn’t even know was possible.
It seems no longer having my wings clipped by the Ice Reapers is giving me a chance to grow. Imagine what it would feel like without the looming weight of any MC altogether?
Do I still want that? I think so, but then I look at Emily and Maggie and I’m blown away with how they’ve accepted me so effortlessly.
“Fine, I can show my face for a little while,” I say as I move to sit up on the bed, while Emily claps excitedly.
“Thank God you didn’t make me beg and plead like a hot mess.”
She gives nothing away, so I glance at Duffer who must be able to read the question in my eyes. “She’s only allowed in the bar area if you’re there with me too.”
My head rears back in surprise as I frown, looking back at my friend. “What did you do before I got here?”
“I wasn’t allowed to go.” She shrugs like it’s no big deal, but if that was the case, then she wouldn’t be this excited about it.
“Emmett likes to overprotect you, huh,” I state as I step into my combat boots and zip them up, and she nods in response.
“That’s an understatement. Ever since Mom died…” She clears her throat, tucking a loose lock of hair behind her ears as she shakes her head. “He always felt like our dad could have done more, so he takes it upon himself to safeguard me from anything and everything. That even includes slipping on the pavement,” she adds with a roll of her eyes, trying to lighten the mood the best she can.
Shit. I didn’t consider that their mom had passed. I haven’t considered a lot of things since I got here. Simply brushing the surface and not digging any deeper out of fear of falling too hard. But I was more than happy to give him a hard time over his fucking heart like that was any of my business.
Shit.
