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“He’s her fuckingboyfriend, Brent. Can you believe that shit?” I was close to shouting, so I took a deep breath. “She has no idea the kind of guy Austin is. He’s no good for her.”
His eyebrows went so high they were damn near on top of his head.
“But you are?”
“I didn’t say that. This is about what a horrible little creepheis,” I said, glancing at my clipboard. I was ready to change the subject.
“Nope. Come clean, Jakey boy. This is about you and Lana.” He scratched his fingers into his beard. “You think I don’t see how you look at her?”
I paused for a moment, trying to say the words right. Then I gave up and told Brent about Lana.
How I’d been more attracted to her when we met than any other woman in my life. How I didn’t explain the wedding band when I should have. How Todd showed up, and how I backed off.
He was there when Todd proposed and knew all about their breakup already. But I told him about my night with Lana before she went to New York.
And I told him how I wanted her back, more than anything.
Brent, being the good friend and business partner that he was, didn’t try to guide me in one direction or another. He didn’t condemn me for sleeping with my brother’s ex or wanting her now.
He just listened, and after I’d said everything I had to say, he said, “Feel any better?”
I did.
“How’s Todd lately?” he finally asked. “He was looking pretty good last time I saw him. Healthier. Looks like he’s doing a good job staying clean, staying out of trouble.”
“He is,” I said with some pride I probably wasn’t entitled to. “Got a new girlfriend, Lisa something, seems crazy about her. She’s been sober for at least a few years, and I think that’s probably a good influence on him. Seems like he’s finally getting his life together.”
“Glad to hear that,” Brent said. “And glad you two made up so you get to see it.”
Brent sucked his front teeth, then he sighed. “Does he know any of what you just told me?”
“He doesn’t,” I admitted, raking my fingers through my hair. “And I have no idea what he’d say about it.”
Brent leaned on his elbows on the table. “If you get back with Lana, his reaction might not be good. You willing to risk that?”
It was a good question. An important one.
It took Todd a long time to get over Lana. Even after he became sober. He really regretted how things ended, saying how he messed up the best thing he ever had.
I’d always done what I could to protect Todd and take care of him. Maybe I’d done too much at times and not enough at others.
But I was tired of giving up my happiness to keep him from being upset, either.
“I’ve thought about Lana for the last three years, and I don’t think that’s going to stop anytime soon, Brent. I’m going to have to risk it. I’ll tell him everything when the time’s right. And when I know that Lana’s willing to make things work. There’s no point in upsetting him if I don’t have to.”
If Lana couldn’t be convinced that we belonged together, I guessed I’d never have to tell him. But that wasn’t a possibility I was anywhere near ready to face.
27
LANA
I walkedinto the bustling taproom of Deft Rock Brewing with Maddie. We were there for an informal meeting to go over new marketing materials with Dylan and Brent.
We came a little early to scope out the customers and get a better feel of the regulars that frequented the place.
I glanced around, taking in the busy taproom. Groups of people laughed and chatted over pints of beer. Rock music played over the speakers, adding to the lively ambiance.
Dylan waved when he spotted us but he was staying busy with other things, only glancing my way now and then. I tried not to let him catch me looking at him.
