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After that, we’d had ice cream in front of the TV before everyone went to bed. This time, for the first time, with Lana in my bed, and a baby monitor turned all the way up on the nightstand.
It was the best fucking night of my life.
And I was looking forward to many more exactly like it as Lana curled up on my chest, fingers tracing over one of my tattoos until she fell asleep.
I couldn’t have anticipated then just how quickly Lana’s path would catch up with her.
And how close I got to losing who had begun to mean the most to me…
CHAPTER SEVENTEEN
Lana
The kids adjusted great.
I mean, mainly because nothing had really changed for them.
We were still in Seth’s house, even though the cottage had finally gotten fixed.
So the yard was the same, the way they played was the same, but they had more space to stretch out, and they had their own separate beds to sleep in.
Eventually, if everything worked out how I hoped it would, I figured that Isaac would move into the room I’d once been sleeping in, and Hazel and Clara would share the other one.
I was trying not to get too ahead of myself with thoughts like that. But when things were going so well, it was hard not to let my mind wander when the kids were busy, and I didn’t have anything pressing to do.
I still worked, of course.
I’d learned my lesson in being completely reliant on a man. I wanted to always know I had my own money stashed away somewhere, so that I never felt trapped again.
Even though I knew down to my bones that Seth was nothing like Simon. That he would never trap me, never make it hard for me to leave.
It was just for my own peace of mind.
So I still opened my tablet, went to the gig site, agreed to any of the jobs that seemed like they suited me. I wrote the blogs and articles, socked away the money, and went about my day, knowing it was there if I ever needed it.
Hazel definitely loved Seth. Mostly because Seth wasn’t as strict about making messes as I was, letting her play with the food when he was preparing it, not caring about markers on the table, or that she took a whole canister of his shaving foam and made a ‘snow town’ with it.
In fact, he’d grabbed some of her horses and played in it with her.
It seemed as if Seth just… didn’t get bent out of shape easily. To him, a mess could always be cleaned up. The fun that was had was the important part to him.
Clara, well, she thought he was hilarious. And soothing when her mama was stressed out and struggling to calm her down because of it.
And Isaac?
Isaac was Seth’s shadow.
Seth was going outside to edge the drive and walkways? Isaac was right there, taking it in, asking questions.
He was right there, trying to help Seth bring the pails to the road on garbage night.
He was staring very seriously at the washing machine with his hands on his hips when it was making a funny noise, and Seth was trying to figure it out before he called in someone.
And, God, it made me get all teary-eyed each time I saw it. Knowing how much Isaac had been craving that male role model in his life. Someone he didn’t have to fear.
“He’s nice to you, right?” he’d asked me one night as I tucked him in, Hazel already out cold a few feet away.
“Yes, baby, he is really nice to me,” I assured him.
“I like him,” Isaac said, gaze skittering away a little at his admission.
“I like him too. And you know what?”
“What?”
“He told me that he likes you too,” I told him, watching as that light sparked in his little eyes.
“And Hazel?” he asked, making my heart squeeze. My sweet, angel kid.
“Yes, of course. Hazel too. And Clara. He likes all of you. He told me,” I assured him, wanting to drive it home that it wasn’t just my opinion.
“I’m gonna help him fix the step tomorrow,” Isaac told me. It wasn’t a big job. Just a couple of bricks that had come loose that needed to be re-mortared. Honestly, it was a couple minute job that would be stretched into an hour just by having Isaac help.
But he wanted to include him.
And, God, my heart just squeezed at that.
“That is going to be some hard work. But I think you are just the man for the job,” I told him before kissing his head. “Now go to sleep.”
It was all like a dream, honestly.
It was everything I had wanted when I first learned I was pregnant with Isaac. A house with room for the kids to grow in, a nice yard, a good man who would take time for the kids, and even enjoy their presence, not just tolerate it. And someone who was, at the end of it all, kind and generous with me.
