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And give Elina a huge dose of bloodbane to finish her off. “Is it the tonic?”
“Yes.”
So he’d begun to make it himself. “Do you truly have a custom of caring for a bride for three days?”
“Not custom, but it is my preference.”
“Ah!” A shaky laugh escaped her. “You did lie!”
“So I did. I am not sorry for it.”
“You should not be. You harmed no one…and helped me.” She bit her lip, studying his face. His eyes seemed darker than ever, but a small hope had begun to bleed through the bleakness that had overtaken his countenance when she’d declared she was a fool for trusting him. But was she? “Why did you marry me?”
“To protect you. To help you return to Aleron and kill your uncle.” His voice roughened as his throat worked again. “And because I love you. You’ve overturned my world, Elina. The moment I first saw your face.”
She pressed a hand over her eyes but still they overfilled in a deluge of overwhelming emotion. “And you would not just say that without meaning it?” she sobbed quietly. “Because of what I confessed to you that night?”
How pitifully desperate she was to be loved.
“Never, Elina.” He lowered his brow to hers. “Never. I loved you already that night. Your strength. Your kindness. Your teasing. You cannot know how many times I nearly revealed myself by laughing.”
At that Elina could only cry more, for she had wanted him to laugh with her on this day. Yet now she was sobbing, unable to stop. Warrick had given to her everything she desperately wanted, had spoken aloud the words she’d yearned to hear for so long. He’d given his heart to her, and now Elina was afraid to trust that it was true. Though she wanted to so badly. To grab hold of the love he offered, and to believe in it, and hold it close to her own heart. To hold him close.
Did she dare?
Elina knew not if she could. And whatever choice she made, she must stop crying first.
She must.
Slowly she quieted and dragged in a shuddering breath. “And then you did laugh.”
With her. Fulfilling one of her wedding day wishes. And as painful as the truth revealed by that laughter had proven to be, was she not glad to know? Was she not glad now to speak with him unhindered?
She was. She truly was.
“I had just completed a magnificent spend over my comely wife, one that near ripped my soul from my flesh along with my seed, and you asked if I was fucking a ghost. I could no more have stopped that laugh than I could have stopped the sun rising.” Warrick gave to her a wry smile. “Though I truly meant to speak with you this night—I had hoped that during these three days alone we could decide how to act. Though at the same time, I wished never to tell you. I never wanted to see you hurt.”
“Hurt because of what you did or what you think Chardryn did?”
“Chardryn. Never did I consider that you would see what I did as a hurtful deception. My only thought was of you, Elina. So I assumed that was all you would see, too. I am sorry for that. Though I know not what else I might have done, what better choice there was, never did I want to hurt you. That is opposite of what I meant to do.” He paused. “I am a thickheaded brute.”
Caught by surprise, Elina sputtered out an amused, “You truly are!”
“And I will fuck you in bizarre ways. Like a pig.”
She laughed aloud. “Oh, gods. You heard that, too? Oh! Oh! And you will drag me from the tent when you get stuck in me!” With her fingers she wiped her eyes. “But what of this night? Despite what Nanny Char says, I will survive your massive size.”
Nanny Char. Her mirth instantly vanished. So did his.
“Two reasons,” he said. “The first is that I can only get my littlest finger into you.”
She frowned at him, bewildered. Then realization struck. “I can remove the rings.”
“Not even for a moment.” Expression harsh, he shook his head. His beribboned fingers tightened on hers. “Until you purge the poison from your body, not for a moment will you remove the jewels. Not a single moment. Swear it to me.”
“I swear it,” she whispered, struck by his urgency. Struck by his concern. “What is the second reason?”
“Never have I lain with anyone but you. Once I am inside your cunt, I might burst after one thrust. And if you get with child before your body is purged—”
Oh. “The poison might harm a growing baby.”
“A growing baby might harm you. The purge will be worse than your disease.”
A tremor of dread shook through her. “And after?”
“You will be better. Mayhap not as well as before the poison. But not ill.”
