Page 55 of If By Chance


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“How are you doing?”

“I’m okay. I like it here,” she replies, her eyes scanning my bookshelf.

“Do you like to read?”

She nods. “I couldn’t bring my books with me.” She pulls at the sleeves of her top, desperate to hide and make herself smaller. There’s a healing bruise around her eye.

“You’re welcome to take one anytime.”

She turns to look at me, a watery smile threatens her mouth. I wonder when is the last time she properly smiled?

“Thank you,” her voice is almost a whisper.

Smaller.

Anything to curl up and disappear.

“Would you like to take a seat?”

“Are you sure? I don’t want to annoy you. I know you’re busy.”

God, that breaks my heart.

“You’re not annoying me. Far from it.”

Slowly, she takes another few steps, gently pulling the chair out to sit.

“Thank you,” she repeats, her eyes drifting to her lap.

“Are you settling in?”

She hums. “Noah likes it. I know he’s only one, but I think he’s happier.” She wipes her sleeve under her eyes. I’m not sure if she’s crying, or if her eyes always look so full with constant tears threatening to fall.

“You’re doing amazing. He’s a beautiful little boy.”

I smile.

She tries to smile back.

I bet her smile is beautiful when she uses it.

She chews her bottom lip, and I can almost feel the rattle in her chest.

“What kind of books do you like?”

Shrugging, she pulls on her sleeves again. “Fantasy. Sometimes romance.” Her cheeks redden.

An escape.

That’s the genre she’s looking for.

Standing, I go to the bookshelf to pluck something I hope she will like.

I place the book on the table. “Have you read this one?” She shakes her head. “This one has fantasy and romance. See how you like it. When you’re done, you can come and pick another.”

Her smile broadens. It’s a tiny hint, but enough for me to get a glimpse.

“That’s kind of you. I’ll be careful with it.”

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