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His face was inches from hers, and she couldn’t focus. Squeezing her eyes shut didn’t help. He was still a blur when she opened them.
Damn.
“I’ll take you now.”
“I don’t want to go home,” she said slowly even though she’d decided she needed to. “I want to stay because I’m celebrating.”
“I think you’ve celebrated enough,” he gritted out.
“You don’t get to tell me what to do.” She hated that being this close was making her want to kiss him then lean into his big body and let him hold her. But then they weren’t that kind of couple. The holding, comforting kind. Unless there was sex involved, they weren’t anything. The thought was a depressing one.
“This is not you. You’re making a fool of yourself, Birdie. You need to go home.” His tone told her he was angry.
“I have as much right as anyone to have fun, and just because I’ve drunish… drunk a few drinks for the firsh time in my life doesn’t mean I’m being a fool.”
“Go out to my car. I’ll drive you home.”
Their faces were so close now she could see his eyes were narrowed. Birdie really liked his eyes.
“Birdie, go out to my car.” His growled words snapped her back to attention.
“Look, Sawyer, I’m having fun, and seeing as you don’t want to have fun with me, you can go away and take your opinions with you.” She was quite proud of that little speech. It came out with no slurring.
“You’re flirting with people, and that could get you in trouble.”
She was so shocked at that, her mouth fell open. “Am I? I’ve never really done that before either.”
He hissed out a breath. “You are a liability. You need to go home and sleep now.”
“Why do you care?”
“Someone has to look out for you,” he snapped back.
“I don’t need it to be you. We’re just FBs like me and Murray.”
“We are not fuck buddies.” He growled. “And you have never even met Murray.”
“Yes, we are, and it has to stop,” Birdie whispered. The alcohol buzz was clearing and with it came the realization her words were right. “This, what we have, is not a good thing.”
“I don’t do more with good girls like you,” he rasped.
That made her chest hurt, but she wasn’t showing him that. Birdie might have to dig deep for her pride in that moment, but she found it. “Because I’d want more? Like dating and spending time together instead of being a dirty little secret?”
“Damn it! You are not a dirty secret. You wanted this, like I did, Birdie.”
“I know.” She felt sad suddenly because she had. Thought it was exciting, but in fact it wasn’t, because for her it had become complicated. “I need more, Sawyer,” Birdie said. “I deserve it, just like you do.”
The silence between them was suddenly heavy. Eyes locked, mouths inches from each other. Birdie felt the hard ridge of his arousal pressing against her belly.
“More than this?” His hand cupped her breast, and Birdie felt the shudder that ran through her, just as Sawyer did.
“What happens when it’s not enough?”
“Then we walk away from each other,” Sawyer said just before he kissed her.
She let him because she wanted one last feel of his mouth on hers. One last time pressed to his body. She was melting into him, but there was still a small kernel of sanity left in her foggy brain.Self-preservation.She pulled out of his arms and back a step.
“Let me go, Sawyer.”
