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I know the look well. It’s his “I’m ready to kick ass” look, and instead of firing me up, it just makes me exhausted.
I’m so tired of fighting.
I’m tired of coming home to a cold bed.
I’m tired of not having someone to rely on. Of having them rely on me.
I’m tired of having nothing and no one.
If only Elaine could see me now, not fighting or giving into my emotions like she always said I did.
“What?” I say again, tiredly. He looks even more shocked as he lowers his guard and takes a step toward me.
“What’s going on?”
“Nothing,” I say again.
“Kiwi, talk to me.” It comes out as an order, and I don’t know if he really thinks he can Prez his way into me telling him what’s wrong. I just stare blankly back at him until he grits his teeth and says, “Please.” I snort and turn around again.
“Just ready for this shit to be over,” I mutter.
He’s silent as he falls into step beside me, and doesn’t say another word until we get into the Chapel. I sink into the closest chair and fold my arms over my chest, my eyes trained on the scuffed table. Bash sighs as he walks past me to his seat at the other end of the table.
“Can you talk to him?” Bash says, and I look at Belfast, lifting my brows expectantly.
“What?” he says and Bash slumps into his seat.
“He speaks,” Bash mumbles.
“I found Ginger,” he says, ignoring Bash. I sit straighter, my body jolting with excitement.
“Where is he?” My voice is low and even.
“He’s in Oregon.”
“Oregon?” I repeat. Belfast nods, his face blank. “Why the fuck is he there?” I look at Bash and he shrugs.
“His father has a house there. Lots of protection,” Belfast says.
“What else do we know about him? His father?” My hands tighten into fists as I stare at Belfast, waiting. He’s slow to respond, and it pisses me the fuck off. Finally, he lifts his eyes to me.
“Carmichael had three kids, two sons and a daughter, one son is dead, the other is Ginger, and the daughter.” He shrugs as he looks back at his computer. “She’s the youngest of the three, around seventeen. She could be dead, or she could be hidden away. No one has seen her in almost five years.” My stomach rolls at the thoughts shooting through my mind.
“Think he sold her?” I ask, glancing at Bash. He looks like he was thinking the same thing. Belfast shrugs again.
“It’s possible. I don’t know her real name, so it took me a while to hunt down that he even had a third kid,” he says. “Since she’s been missing, it’s possible she could’ve been sold. Or maybe her father knows he has a lot of enemies and is keeping her hidden to protect her.”
“I don’t think a man like Carmichael would give a shit if anything happened to his family,” Bash says. “I think he cares about himself and how much money he can make. That’s it.” I nod my agreement. He turns his attention to me, disgust and fury on his face. “You gonna go after Ginger?”
I need to go after him. I need to bring him back here so I can have my fun before Axel kills him. But the thought of being that far away from Kennedy makes me itchy.
But she made it clear she doesn’t want me.
She made it clear what she thinks of me.
“Yeah,” I say, nodding as I slid my eyes back to Belfast. “Can you get me an exact location?” He nods as he types on his laptop.
“Spence is sending one of his guys with you,” he says and I stop breathing. “One of his…investments.” My eyes narrow.
