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I don't know why those words, out of everything Eli had said last night, stuck with me. Maybe because they'd shattered whatever ridiculous, tiny amount of hope I'd had in my heart that things could work between us.
But he didn't want needy, and I was the definition of needy. Yeah, maybe on the outside I seemed independent, like he wouldn't need to hold my hand constantly, or reassure me with pretty words and kind gestures. But I would need that. I'd need it all, and so much more.
It was for the best, I reminded myself. It would be weird and terrible to fall for him—well, harder than I already had. I didn't know when it even happened. Maybe the second I met him, or maybe when he chose to make sure I was okay and not Mom after the fight the other night.
I blinked at the realization. He chosemeandmyfeelings over Mom. I couldn’t remember anyone ever doing that before.
But it didn't matter when it happened. It didn't matter because he was off limits, and even if he wasn't, he made it clear that he didn't want someone like me.
I sighed and ran my hand through my hair, tugging lightly on it. Thankfully, it was Saturday, so Eli let me have the day off. So, I decided to hangout with Lily. I sent her a text to let her know I was outside her place, and was now waiting for her to come to the car.
Five seconds, or five minutes, it was hard to know with her. Sometimes she'd be ready well before I showed up. Sometimes she'd start getting ready when she got myI'm heretext.
Her dad, Theo, stepped outside and stretched, his t-shirt riding up his flat stomach. His brown hair was tousled like he'd just woken up. Which wouldn't be surprising since he was basically a vampire—he slept during the day, worked all night.
He strolled toward my car, a lazy grin on his face. He was a few years older than Eli, but somehow looked younger. Despite working as a paramedic, the stress of the job hadn't taken a toll on his looks. Yet.
I rolled my window down as he approached, and he leaned his tattooed forearms on the door as he poked his head inside.
"Hey, kiddo," he said, smiling. "How you holding up?"
"Oh, you know," I laughed.
"Your mom still a bitch?" he asked bluntly, and I laughed again. He'd always been more like an older brother to not only me but to his own daughter, too. Mom hated that he treated us as actual human beings with our own thoughts and feelings and not like idiotic children...even when we were idiotic children.
"She'll never not be one," I said, and he nodded in agreement. He rubbed his hand over his stubbly jaw as he watched me.
"You know you're always welcome here," he said. I looked out the front window, sighing.
"Things are fine right now. But I may start crashing on your couch soon." If things kept getting more awkward between Eli and I, I wouldn’t have a choice. "But everything is fine."
"Yeah, I don't believe that for a fucking second," he laughed sarcastically. "Just come stay with us. The diner won't miss you."
"Thanks," I said dryly. He flashed me an unapologetic grin, his green eyes, the same as Lily's, twinkling. "Lil didn't tell you?"
"Tell me what?"
"I'm staying at Eli's," I said, nearly choking on his name. "He asked me to take care of his daughter while he worked." Theo's brows lifted. "It's a good gig, though. She's an easy kid."
"And things aren't weird between you?" he asked, and my spine snapped straight.
"What are you talking about?" I blurted, feeling my face heating. "Why would things be weird?" He gave me a look.
"Just thought it would be weird to live with some guy you barely know," he said slowly. "You okay?"
"I know him," I said, probably too defensively. "And he's not some guy."
"Is there something—"
"Stop harassing my friend." Thankfully, Lily shoved Theo out of the way before he could interrogate me further. She yanked the door open and effortlessly slid inside. "We'll be back later."
He leaned on the door again, giving us both a pointed look. "What trouble are you causing today?" he asked, and I huffed out a laugh.
"You know we never cause trouble," I said.
"We're just going to the mall." A grin curved Lily's lips. "Can we have some money, please?" She stuck out her bottom lip, giving him the biggest puppy eyes I'd ever seen.
"You're going to make me go broke," he sighed, but still pulled his wallet from his back pocket. "Please spend it wisely." He handed her two hundreds, before holding out the same to me. I didn't reach for it, feeling uncomfortable at taking his money.
