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My fingers brushed his where we had our hands on the seat between us, and I almost doubled over at the thrill of casually touching him. I didn’t move my hand away and neither did he. The bus bumped along, and neither of us mentioned what was happening. He stared straight ahead, except for when he stole peeks at me. I split my attention between glancing at him and watching trees fly past my window, then dug deep for my courage. Was I really doing this? I slid my hand over and linked my pointer and middle fingers with his pinkie.
He flashed me a warm smile.
I’m touching him! Don’t be a nerd, don’t ruin this.
We sort of held hands the rest of the way to New Gothenburg. I stared out the window but couldn’t focus on anything except the way my heart hammered and how I felt like I might float away. It took about a half hour to wind through a few small suburbs before the tall downtown buildings came into view. Lake Ontario sparkled beside the highway, and I felt happy as I leaned my shoulder against Ethan’s. He pressed back.
In no time at all Ethan was reaching up to pull the cord to get the bus to stop at a street corner, and I followed him off the bus onto the sidewalk. I hadn’t noticed the bus making its way into downtown. I’d been too busy concentrating on Ethan’s body heat and the hint of the soap he’d showered with this morning.
“I’ve never been to this part of the city.” I glanced around at the older brick structures on either side of the street. We passed an apartment building with crumbling decorative masonry along the top. Most of these places were only two stories tall and none seemed to go higher than three.
“It’s not as bad as it seems,” he said with a defensive note in his tone.
“Uh, I believe you.” My heart took off flying. I didn’t want to offend him. His brow furrowed, and all I wanted to do was smooth away his sudden bad mood. “I was just making conversation.”
He ran a hand over his face. “I’m used to people acting differently than you do. You know, people are sometimes assholes. Do you forgive me?”
“You didn’t say you were sorry.” I smiled at him.
“I’m very, very sorry.” He stepped close enough that the tips of his boots bumped my shoes, and all at once, I was aware of my cock and how my pants were too tight. I let out a long breath.
“Then you’re forgiven.”
“Good,” he murmured and clasped my wrist. He hummed and rubbed his thumb over my pulse point, and I lost the ability to think. “I’m going to go inside and sell this watch so I can get the cash to take you out.” He jerked a thumb at the shop to our left. Demon’s Den gleamed on a neon sign above the door, and a small blue glowing24/7lit the window.
“You don’t have to do that. I could pay, or we could just hang out if you’re not comfortable with that.”
He frowned and slid his hand up to my shoulder. I nearly died when he glided his palm to the back of my neck. Every inch of me zinged with sweet pops of electricity. “You deserve better than fucking off around New Gothenburg.”
“Do I?”
Ethan leaned closer, and I instinctively touched his chest—not certain if I wanted to hold him off or drag him closer. He smirked as he backed away. “Yes.”
“Okay, if you say so.”
He snickered while heading into the shop. I stared at the sign in the window. Guilt began to grow in my chest as I imagined him selling his watch, which was nice enough it might’ve been passed on to him from a relative, just so he could waste money on me. Shame built up in my stomach, and I paced a small circle on the sidewalk. A man jogged past in sweats and no shirt, and I wasn’t paying attention and almost bumped him. He sent me a nasty look.
“Sorry,” I mumbled, but he had earbuds in and didn’t look back after he was past me.
When Ethan came outside, I snagged his hand. “Can you go back in?”
“Why?” he asked with a frown.
“Your watch. Please don’t get rid of something nice because of me.” Nearby on our right, a tall old man dressed in a robe came out the front door of the building and lit up a cigarette. I coughed as the smoke wafted in our direction and tickled my nose. In the distance a car alarm went off and someone started to shout. The city was finally waking up.
Ethan’s eyes widened. “Oh. Oh! Don’t worry about it. You’re worth it.”
I knew I should encourage him to go back in for his watch, but my heart melted a little, and I found myself smiling at him.
“What would you like to do? There’s a bar around here that will serve us,” he said.
“Uh, I don’t drink.” My face heated in embarrassment. Cider Mill High was full of mostly good people, but even there I was the outlier. Almost everyone my age drank when they got the chance, and I hated how people stared at me when I said I didn’t enjoy the taste. Even Ethan seemed confused; although, he didn’t begin to make fun of me.
“Like, you don’t at all?” He scratched his temple and raised his eyebrows.
“Even if I did, it’s not noon yet.”
“Hmm. Yeah. Fair.” He frowned and glanced around like he was lost.
