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“Exactly,” I say, shivering at the idea of her getting injured or worse. “And you’re never going back to that job again. I don’t care if they hold it for you forever.”
Her eyes flash as she sets down her glass. “Are you demanding that I be a stay-at-home wife, Your Highness? Should I don an apron and take off my shoes…”
This makes me laugh. “I think the American expression is ‘barefoot and pregnant in the kitchen.’”
Even as I say this, the anxious knot in my stomach unwinds, and an odd warmth flows through me. I don’t want a wife to be unhappy at home. I may be a bit of a boor, but I’d never demand that a partner give up a fulfilling career. But the preternatural lizard brain has locked onto the image of Kala pregnant, feet bare, with another small child balanced on her hip.
She points at me and winks. “That’s the one.”
We lock eyes for a moment.
This is what I crave, for her to be safe. At home and surrounded by my love and protection, preferably behind a locked gate. But would she be content?
I scrap the entire ridiculous fantasy. Because there’s no way anyone would be content with me. I drink too much. Stay out too late. And I’m unused to being accountable for my behavior.
She would worry herself to tears, and I would grow to resent her.
However, that doesn’t change the fact that I do not want to get eaten by a giant snake on this volcanic rock.
I shake my head. “No, I don’t want that for you. Still, can’t we just brazen our way through? The armed guards will not shoot at us if we simply walk out. I promise you.”
“Etienne.”
“You said yourself that those American thugs missed because they didn’t want to start an international incident. This is no different from that.”
She looks at me thoughtfully for a moment. “You’re a genius, you know.”
No one, not one person in my life, has ever said such a thing. “I am?”
Kala nods, a wicked gleam in her eye. “That’s exactly what we’re going to do. We make everyone here think we plan to climb out through the forest. We walk right out the front door when everyone is out looking for us.”
“You do realize that makes you the genius, darling. Staging a phony escape as a distraction was not what I was suggesting.”
“You inspired the thought. If I say you’re a genius, that’s the end of the discussion.”
I blurt out the words before I can stop myself. “I fucking love you, you boss-ass bitch.”
She blushes and tucks her hair behind her ear. “You say that now, but you haven’t seen the half of my inner bossy bitch. You might not love her if she has to boss you around.”
I say nothing else about the L word as we discuss our decoy plans loud enough for staff, servers, and Steffen to hear.
I may never be free of loving this woman for the rest of my miserable life.
28
Kala
The plan is going to work. It simply has to.
It hurts my heart to deceive the housekeepers, whom I’ve grown quite fond of. But much like I don’t want the king pestering Flora for information, I also don’t want the maids to lose their jobs for helping us. Yet, they insist. They give us an extra set of uniforms to pack away as a disguise, among other things.
On the evening we’re set to disappear, Steffen checks on us incessantly.
“Are you sure you don’t want to make dinner reservations?” He wrings his hands, and his forehead sweats.
“We’re quite alright,” Etienne says, tucking me in close as we watch the sunset from our beachside cabana. “Besides, is a reservation even necessary?”
That is too true, as we’re the only guests here. Etienne exchanges a look with me, and I wink as my insides turn to molten chocolate.
