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And in my dazed state, I’m palming the back of his head. I’m sliding my fingers through the hair at his nape. I’m rising onto my tiptoes just as I’m pulling him closer to me.
That little smile on his lips as he closes the distance between us is the most nervous, excited, genuine smile I’ve ever seen. I feel my lips curling into a smile, too.
Our lips press together and I try my best to restrain myself from going too far. But once we start kissing, I can’t break away. Neither can Harry. Each time we pull apart for a few seconds, our lips somehow wander back together. Over and over and over.God—I’ve wanted this.
His teeth nip at my bottom lip. Then his tongue follows, tracing a path that ignites my nerves. I lose a grip on my self-control. I gasp against his mouth, causing my lips to part. Harry’s velvety tongue slithers through the gap and—
“Excuse me!” The feedback of the microphone ripples through the air, startling Harry and me apart.
My head shoots toward the stage and I find Luke’s eyes right on me.
Goddammit.
“If everyone could find their seats.” That annoying voice of his reverberates again. “The time has arrived for my contributory speech.” He says it like it’s supposedly the moment we’ve been waiting for all night.
Harry places a final kiss on my forehead, then he guides me to our table and pulls out my chair for me. His arm is right back around me when he sits. I like the way his fingertips stroke up and down my bare arm.
With a huff in Harry’s direction, Luke gets going with his monologue. At first, he seems to be following his scripted notecard talk. His gaze keeps bobbing from me, to the crowd, and back toBambi. I’m hoping really hard that no one notices how his uncomfortable gaze seems to linger on me longer than the other options though.
When Harry sweeps his lips across my shoulder again, that’s the last straw for my jealous ex. Luke turns fire engine red and tosses his notecard on the floor. From there, the night goes wildly off script.
“You know what? Forget this boring speech I’m boring you with tonight because it’s boring. I’m only here tonight because of my lovely girlfriend. Bambi, stand up, baby. Let everybody see you.”
At the table next to mine, Bambi rises to her feet, blushing. She does that curtsy thing again.Oh boy.
“She’s the most charitable and giving woman I know. It was Bambi who inspired me to be a better person, to step up, and donate a third of my annual income to this important cause. Let’s give it up for my girlfriend. The ideal woman. The perfect woman. In all my life, I’ve never had a partner as amazing as her.”
Ouch!The dig isn’t lost on me.Pompous jerk.
“If every woman were as wonderful as my Bambi, you’d have every man stepping up and being the best version of himself.”
My god. I suddenly don’t know whether to puke or cry.
Despite my urge to retch at the mere sight of this man’s face, it really does sting. All those things he’s saying about this new girl? Those are all the words he never said to me in the years we were together. And now, right in front of me, he’s saying those sweet things to someone who’s practically a stranger. Rubbing it in my face that I’m not perfect. That I’m not ‘ideal’. That I wasn’t good enough for him.
Then, just to give his jagged kitchen knife a good twist in my gut, Luke drops to one knee on the stage. Around me, people gasp. “This emotion sweeping over me is very spur-of-the-moment and I’m sincerely sorry I don’t have an engagement ring.” He shrugs sheepishly, theatrically smiling out at the crowd. “But I just can’t go another moment without making you mine. So what do you say, doll? Make me the luckiest man in the room?” He purposely lands his eyes on me before he resumes his proposal. “Will you marry me?”
Everyone in the ballroom jumps to their feet and joyful clapping pours out. It’s like something from out of a cheesy movie, and it makes me woozy.
That stab in my chest spreads until I feel the pain all over. Marriage was the one thing Luke always dangled in my face—a prize I’d win if I behaved like a good little girl. If I prioritized him over work. If I minimized myself and made him feel like a man.
And now, here he is, offering my lost prize to a stranger.
I mean, I don’t want it. The endless hurdles to that shiny, tainted trophy were just too much. They cost me my ‘self’. But being witness to this charade tonight is making me ill.
A tug on my hand brings me back to earth. With a concerned look on his face, Harry gently coaxes my frozen form up to my feet. I stand among the rest of the crowd and mechanically start clapping even as the overwhelming feeling of worthlessness threatens to bury me alive.
I sure hope my therapist is on call tonight, because I’m gonna need a session ASAP.
17
HARRY
As I drive Nadia home, I can tell she’s lost inside her head. Understandably, she wasn’t in the mood to stay at the gala much longer after the spectacle her idiot ex put on. Seriously, who can blame her?
So we made our excuses, picked up our coats, and snuck out before the end of the event.
I hate seeing her like this. Especially since we’d been having such a great night. She’d been all flirty smiles and curious touches, letting her hands roam all over me before the stupid Luke debacle unfolded. I should strangle that lame jackass for spoiling our night.
