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I grind my teeth together at the insinuation. It’s not like I can say anything back, not without giving too much away.
I sigh, pushing the article away from me. “You guys sure have gotten creative over the summer.” Even to my own ears, my voice sounds weary. Shelby’s eyes dart back and forth between all of us. She looks like she wants to interject, but doesn’t know how. I give her a look and a slight shake of my head
“You want the punishments to stop?” Eli asks. “Take the bet.”
I push my seat back, forcing Zaiden out of my personal space. Shelby stands at my side, waiting to follow my lead.
“We’re not kids anymore,” I sneer, hoping my tone is convincing enough when all I really want to do is hide in their arms and let them protect me once more. “I’m not playing your games.”
I miss our games. The adrenaline rush. The punishments and rewards that started to dance over the line the last few months we spent together. All the laughter that happened in between.
My memories swirl around me, dancing across my skin. Instead of wallowing in pity, I let them wash over me, giving me the resolve to face what I have to.
“It’s cute you think you have a choice,” Hudson chimes in an amused voice.
I tuck my arm into Shelby’s, pulling her with me as I move into the aisle. I pause, meeting each of their eyes. “There’s always a choice and I made mine. Remember?”
I don’t give them a chance to respond as I hurry down the stairs, dragging Shelby with me. As soon as we burst through the doors she gasps and starts talking a mile a minute again. I don’t let her slow us down and continue to pull her along with me. As soon as we clear the building and the fresh air helps me feel like I can almost breathe again, I finally give her my attention.
She stops talking abruptly, shaking her head with a sheepish look. “Are you okay?” she stammers softly.
“I will be,” I answer, giving her a smile. I check the time on my phone and curse. I only have fifteen minutes before Carson will be free from his class. “But I really need to go and try to explain the situation to Carson,” I continue in a rush, now desperate to get to his house.
“Oh, I understand,” she replies grimly. Yeah, I bet you aren’t envious of that conversation, even if we were a normal couple.
“I’ll see you tonight,” I promise before dashing to head off campus and make it to his place before he does. She waves goodbye, but doesn’t think twice about sending me off to see him. As far as she’s concerned, there’s nothing odd about my relationship with him.
I move quickly without drawing any attention to myself. Carson will have his car on campus even if it is just a short walk to his place, meaning I need every minute of my head start to beat him there. I curse myself for not having brought my car with me, but Carson saw no need for me to have it when we drove up together. It didn’t seem worth the fight at the time.
I make it to the house and don’t notice any cars in front of the house. I knock on the front door and wait, shifting from foot to foot, but no one comes. I try the doorbell, but still, no one comes. I check the time and know Carson will be pulling up any minute now.
A chill makes the hairs on my arms raise. A distinct feeling that if I am not exactly where he told me to be, the consequences of today will be even greater. I chide myself for letting my thoughts get away from me again.
I try the door knob and relief floods me as it turns easily. Of course the rich boys here would never worry about having to lock their front doors. Why would they? I close the door behind me and make my way through the increasingly familiar house and go straight for Carson’s room.
Thankfully, I don’t run into anyone and the house seems to be empty. Relief and anxiety over that fact war inside me. It means I have a chance to get Carson to relax before he has to face anyone and any potential criticism over the newspaper article. At the same time, it means there’s no one here Carson has to be on his best behavior for. No one here to ensure he can’t take things too far.
I laugh nervously to myself. That’s not a real fear. I don’t have to be scared of Carson that way. I just have to keep reminding myself of that fact.
I fidget, pacing around his room, not sure what to do with myself as I wait for him to get here. I let my eyes wander over the stark, minimalist decor of the room. Everything in its perfect place, all crisp lines, not a paper in disarray. This is probably a terrible idea, but I don’t want to sit on his bed and just wait for him. I wring my hands together, a quick peek should be okay. I don’t have much time, but looking around is better than worrying myself right into a panic attack.
I move quickly, opening the drawers at his desk and scanning through the documents and notebooks there. Anything that can help me get any kind of leverage on Carson, I think I may need it now more than ever. He has a file for each of his housemates here, of course he does. It’s too much to get pictures of now, but I’ll come back for those. I place everything back, neatly. Ensuring nothing looks out of place before moving on.
The rest is mostly stuff for school, nothing that will actually help me. I move away from his desk and go to his closet. Fuck. How is everything so orderly in here? I don’t think I’ve ever seen a closet more organized. There’s no way he does this shit himself.
His rooms at his house and their summer home were the same, but I already knew he had a live-in maid for both residents. I didn’t expect his closet here to be as pristine as back home. I check the time and I know I won’t have time to go through all of his drawers. There’s most likely nothing there anyways. He won’t have the video stored anywhere I could easily get access to it.
I head straight for his dirty laundry and quickly start pulling clothes out and going through his pockets. I just need a hint. Anything that could point me in the right direction of where he could be storing that damn video. He wouldn't trust just having it on his cloud. I know there has to be a physical copy somewhere.
My hands shake as I get to the bottom of the pile and have nothing but a fucking breath mint to show for it. Fuck. I should have known I wouldn’t be lucky enough to just find a scrap of paper in his pocket with the information for a security deposit box on it. This isn’t a movie.
I turn around in a rush. Okay, everything looks how it should. No sign I was ever in here. I go back into his room and try to look around with fresh eyes. Calm eyes, even though I can’t stop the trembling of my fingers. Would he even hide anything in here?
I hear a car door slam only moments before the front door is thrown open. I know it’s him and he’s fuming. Fuck. It’s okay Bri, just breathe. That’s all we have to do. Keep breathing. I abandon my search and start wringing my hands in the center of his room.
We just have to play up the same attitude we had last week. It’s all just a revenge tactic from jilted guys from my past. There’s nothing to the rumors. I’m not even worried about the lasting impact on my reputation, this kind of stuff will be forgotten about in just a couple of weeks. No one is even talking about the flyers any longer. This will be the same. I know reminding Carson of that won’t calm him though.
Shit.
