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I list off all the names of the guys in the house that I can remember, which is admittedly only a few of them. She cuts me off, “Just give me their address. I’ll figure it out.” I laugh as I rattle off the address I’ve had to memorize. “Do you want me to look into all the other members in older years too?”
My mouth drops open in shock. “No! There’s like almost a hundred of them.” She shrugs like it really wouldn’t be that big of a deal. I shake my head as I give her a few of the names I do know off the top of my head, including the fraternity president and vice president. At least our families go way back so I know with them I’ll have some level of protection. Wouldn’t hurt to find out what they’ve been up to recently though.
“This is easy.” Shelby beams at me as she closes the notebook.
I give her an appraising look. “I didn’t think you would agree so readily,” I admit.
She rolls her eyes. “I may come from a different world, but I know all about having to work the system to climb to the top of the social ladder. Your ladder may be gilded in gold and your secrets lie in different places, but the fight isn’t all that different.”
Huh. I nod as I think about her words. I’ve never really had to fight for my spot in society. My parents or the guys always made sure I had one, ready and waiting for me. They’ve carried me for so long through so many different things, I never realized how much work it would be to stand on my own two feet.
“Thanks for having my back.” Shelby just gives me another small smile before we both get back to work.
Time passes by quickly as I work on editing my paper. The silence between us is far more comfortable now that she isn’t sneaking worried glances at me anymore. A weight feels like it’s been lifted off my chest. I may not be surrounded by protectors anymore, but I’m not completely alone. Not really. I’m almost happy for the chance to step out from behind the guys' shadows and stand up for myself. I’d be happier at their side, but since that’s impossible, at least I have this.
I check the time and curse to myself. Time went by too fast. I start rapidly packing up my stuff. “Sorry, girl. I gotta go get ready for a party with Carson’s fraternity.”
She looks up at me, surprise flickering in her eyes. “A party?”
Fuck. There’s a little bit of hurt there too. I bite into my lip. I hate that I can’t tell her everything, hate that she’s proved more than ever that she’s got my back and I’m ditching her for my boyfriend. “I’d invite you, but you would hate it.” Truth is I hate it. I wouldn’t be caught dead hanging out with Carson and his jackass cronies if I could help it. No way am I subjecting Shelby to those horrors.
“Right, of course,” she agrees, dropping her gaze back to her books. Her cheeks reddening. I can only guess what she’s thinking.
I drop back into my seat and grab her hand. “Can I tell you a secret?” She looks back up at me.
“Of course,” her voice comes out uncertain.
“Carson is an asshole,” I tell her honestly. She snorts in surprise. “His friends are even worse. But none of them know I’m in the dorms. Carson would be pissed. He’s kind of uppity like that.”
“But you’re not like that at all.” She tilts her head in confusion. Her unspoken question hanging between us.
I shrug like it isn’t a big deal. “You know what they say about opposites,” I joke. “Plus, most of the men in my world are assholes.” I give her a pointed look and she dissolves into giggles.
“I’ve noticed,” she agrees, thinking about the guys.
“Some assholes are just worth loving,” I say, smiling. At least that part is true, even if she thinks I’m referring to Carson when I say it. I just need to keep this mask in place and pray everyone thinks the same as she does.
I used to love parties, even the endless extravagant ones my parents always throw. Even when the guys and I had to be perfectly well behaved and not jump into the pool in our black tie wear, like seriously that was one time, but those days are long gone. I’ve always imagined what it would be like going to my first frat party, from the black mini dress I’d throw on, to the beer keg I’d make the guys steal with me, but my reality is nothing like I imagined.
I’ve not even been here an hour and already my party quota for the term is full. I think I would have taken Shelby up on her interest in coming if it didn’t put my secrets in danger. At least with her here I could have had someone around me that has my back, instead of being surrounded by people who just want to put a knife in it.
Of course the most important thing about tonight is playing the perfect little girlfriend that Carson expects me to be, while my cheeks hurt from smiling too much.
Can you die from too much forced fake happiness?
Right now I really hope so.
Carson has kept me glued to his side since the second I walked through the door and I can feel the suffocation of his presence weighing me down. Especially considering the amount of times I have had to act like the doting partner. Being around other frat guys is bad enough but having to deal with a hoard of giggling girls too is even worse. All of which are looking at me like I stole their favorite toy and would literally kill to be in my place. At this point, I’m kind of hoping they will.
Three of them in particular have been eyeing me for the last hour and I already know their type because I am their type. They’re rich, beautiful, have a successful family name, and an insane net worth, but none of that matters, not here, not to me.
Offering Carson a polite smile and chaste kiss to the cheek, I ask for permission to be excused to the bathroom. Keeping a straight face while simultaneously cursing him to the fiery pits of hell is hard work, but hey, I’m a multitasker. I take my time freshening up and enjoying the peace and solace the bathroom offers me, even with the deep thump of music blaring from the other side. It’s nice to just be me for a second, not the me that Carson forces me to be. I shouldn’t be surprised that when I open the bathroom door I find the three girls from earlier waiting along the wall across from me.
Damn, okay, I guess we are doing this.
I flash them all my fakest smile. “Ladies, to what do I owe the pleasure?” My words come out with such a sarcastic drawl that if Z and Hudson were still my friends, they’d be proud.
“You’re Brielle Montgomery?” One of them sneers. “As in the Montgomerys?”
