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His eyes pop open in surprise but he doesn't move, just looks at me, waiting for me to speak.
"I'll do it. I want to fuck you," I blurt out, holding his shocked gaze.
Chapter 14
Chaseputshishandson my hips, his gaze warm as he takes a moment to absorb my words.
"Okay," he says softly. "Something is bothering you but we don't have to get into that. If you're sure, then we just need to have a little talk first."
I grumble. "I don't want to talk about what happened right now. I just want todo it."
He nods. "I'm not talking about that. There's just some things you need to know first. Safety things."
I blink at him, utterly confused. "Like a safety briefing? This isn't an airplane."
Chase laughs, suddenly gripping me tighter as he stands up. I yelp in shock, my legs automatically snaking around his waist as I cling for dear life. He walks us down to his bedroom door, reaching behind me to open it and let us in.
Looking around the room, it's nearly identical to Beau's – tidy, green, almost the same furniture, except it seems like it almost has a slightly darker vibe. The black sheets and blanket on the bed are nearly laid out until he sets me down.
Chase sits down next to me, his hand rubbing mine. "There's something you need to know about me. Probably all of us, but let's just start with me."
"Okay," I say slowly, shifting nervously.
I had expected him to just take me on the couch without a word. I have no idea what's happening and it unsettles me a little.
"I love giving pleasure. A lot. Sometimes it can be too much though. So, I need to ask if there's anything you know of that you don't like, or things that would make you uncomfortable."
"Like kinks?" I ask.
He nods. "Exactly."
I shake my head. "I don't know any really. I mean, I don't want you to hurt me. Like when that girl gets belted inFifty Shades of Grey. Also, I don't want someone to pee on me."
Chase chuckles. "We'll talk about things before they happen so you can decide if you are okay with trying it. But first, do you have any sensory issues? Anything like claustrophobia?"
What the fuck?
"No…" I answer hesitantly. "Are we not just going to have sex?"
"No," Chase says. "Sex is not a race. It's a journey. It's about feeling safe and being able to lose yourself in the moment without overthinking things and without having to worry about what is happening."
I shift closer to him. "Okay, I'm listening."
He gives my hand a little squeeze. "The way I like to do things, they can be intense. In a good way, but still… intense. I want you to use safe words if it starts getting too much. We can use the color zones."
"Like red for stop?" I ask, my face scrunched up in confusion.
He nods. "Red means stop. Yellow means it's starting to get too much. It's really important that you communicate with me. Sex is about trust and communication. You're allowed to speak up without fear, so if anything is making you uncomfortable or you don't want to do something, tell me."
"Chase, I'm getting worried," I mumble, suddenly starting to regret my impulsive actions.
He smiles warmly. "There's nothing to worry about. I promise you that. How do you feel about toys?"
I laugh. "I've never tried them. Wanted to but couldn't afford it."
Chase grins. "Perfect. And just so you know, I'll use protection but I'm also clean. Did you finish your antibiotics?"
I cringe, suddenly feeling dirty again. Chase notices, squeezing my hand tightly. "It's nothing to be ashamed of."
