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I shake my head with a sigh, following at her side.
As we walk in silence through the children’s section, my bullshit meter starts to buzz. She’s not stopping. My wife has no interest in looking at baby furniture? Rachel “Look How Tiny and Cute” Price isn’t trying to convince me we need a child’s wooden kitchen set? No heated discussion over adding another stuffed animal to the menagerie?
“Rakas,” I mutter, pulling her to a halt. “What is going on—”
“Fuck. Alright, fine,” she huffs. Her entire demeanor changes. She’s no longer holding my hand, she’s clinging to it. Her dark eyes go wide as she gazes up at me. Her nerves set me on edge.
“Rakas, what—”
“I said I’d go along with this, but now I’m panicking,” she says. “Please know how much we all love you, okay? And if you’ll just let this happen, I’ll do anything you want, baby. I’m serious.Anything. Pick your kinkiest fantasy—”
“Rakas—”
“Or chores,” she says. “I’ll get on my knees and scrub every baseboard with soap and water. I’ll clean your hockey gear for a month—”
“Rachel,” I growl, hands on her shoulders. I lower my face closer to hers. “Breathe…then talk to me. What’s wrong?”
She sucks in a breath, holding it in her cheeks. She lets it out in a puff. “Nothing,” she says, shaking her head. “Nothing is wrong. Just know we all love you so damn much.” But I know she’s lying. It looks like holding in the truth is about to make her pop like a balloon.
“Rachel—”
“Just come on,” she says, pulling me along. “And remember that, while I may be complicit, I was definitely not the mastermind.”
My heart stops as brain catches up.
Oh fuck. She can’t mean…
We step around the corner into the café and—
“HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!”
I jolt to a halt, confronted by a massive crowd of people shouting all at once. Every single person I know in this city seems to be crowded inside this IKEA. The entire Rays team, their wives and kids, support staff, our neighbors. I even see my favorite barista from the local coffee shop wearing a party hat and blowing a noisemaker.
Above their heads, a massive banner reads “Happy Birthday, Mars!” There are balloons, kids shouting and running, noise poppers…and I’m the center of attention. This is my personal hell. I feel frozen.
Next to me, Rachel squeezes my hand. “You still alive?” she asks, peering up at me. “Remember, I had—”
“Nothing to do with this. Yes, I know,” I say, recovering my breath. I squeeze her hand in reassurance.
The guys all surge forward and there’s one face in the lead wearing a side grin.
“This was allll my idea!” Jake shouts, wrapping me in a big hug. “I fucking love you, man.”
“I know,” I say, just letting it happen. There’ll be no stopping him at this point. Why fight it?
“Dude, he’s fuckin’ pissed,” Novy says with a laugh.
“Told you he would be,” says Morrow. “Hey, man. Happy birthday,” he adds, cuffing my shoulder.
Jake lets me go, turning his attention to Rachel. He wraps her in a quick embrace. “I can’t believe that actually worked. You were so surprised,” he says at me.
“Shoulda seen your face,” Davidson laughs, taking a sip of his fizzy water.
“I was sure you’d break and give us all away,” Jake teases Rachel.
“I nearly did,” she replies, and they all laugh.
Jake slings an arm around my shoulder, pulling me forward. “Come on, old man. Come check out your party.”
