AllFreeNovel
Share Us
“No, so that I didn’t think it was my father, Arthur! Everyone said he cut costs, that he got what was coming to him with that explosion. And… wait… if he knew it was Caspar and Harold, why did he…? I always thought he couldn’t stand that his mistakes killed those people. If he knew the truth…”
“Sometimes, we’re better off not knowing something that could hurt us.” His words are quietly spoken. He stands, moving close to me.
“No. I think what hurts the most is that I’ve been lied to for so long.” If someone stabbed me in the stomach and twisted the knife it would hurt less than this. “My father. My own father lied to me. You have been lying to me.”
He reaches out for my shoulders, and I take a step back. “Dayna, sweetheart, you’re upset. Calm down.”
“Of course I’m fucking upset, Arthur! I’m wondering whether my father ever loved me.”
“That’s ridiculous. He loved you more than life itself.”
“That’s bullshit! He killed himself. He left me, and I thought I understood it, but it was all a lie. If he could lie to me for so long, he couldn’t have loved me.”
“Is that how you define how much a person cares about you?”
I didn’t think I had anything left, but saltwater streaks my cheeks. “Why? Why would he kill himself if he loved me?”
“Do not doubt how much he adored you. You meant everything to him, Dayna. He killed himself because his heart was broken. He… he felt betrayed. The worst betrayal.” Arthur’s eyes glaze. “I love you like my own,” he croaks, and a sob escapes his lips. “I’m sorry.”
“Arthur?”
“He wasn’t always nice, Dayna. He was my best friend, but he could be wicked. He drank too much.”
“What are you trying to say? Say it. Say it now.”
“I wanted to retire, but I couldn’t; I had responsibilities. I didn’t know what they were going to do.”
“Who?” I start backing away from him, slowly making for the door. “What are you talking about?”
“I gave them the blueprints of the rig, Dayna. I’m sorry. So sorry. I can never forgive myself.”
I’m sobbing, my shoulders shaking. “Did he know? Did my father know?”
“It ate me up. I couldn’t stand that he thought he was to blame. He was like a brother to me. I told him everything.”
I cover my face with my hands. “It was your betrayal. That’s why he killed himself.”
Arthur falls to his knees and reaches out his hands towards me. The room spins around me and I squeeze my eyes shut.
“Arthur!” Evelyn runs to his side, but he bats her away.
“He went back for you. He went back on the rig to save your life.”
“I know. Please believe I’m sorry, Dayna. Know that I’ll never forgive myself for what I did.”
I run from the house, from the man I’ve always trusted with my life, because I don’t know what else to do. I climb into my car and skid away, not thinking or seeing straight. I drive to anywhere, nowhere, because I have nowhere to go.
I’m alone.
I DON’T CONSCIOUSLY drive here, but I find myself parked at the edge of the cemetery, looking through the tall, black iron gates. He didn’t deserve it. No one on that rig deserved to suffer the explosion. Yet I’m sitting here wondering whether my father brought it all on himself, on all of us.
I rest my chin on the steering wheel, staring at the trees swaying in the wind. The sky is dark and starless, just grey-black. Clouds move slowly above the headstones, the souls laid to rest.
“Can you rest now, Dad?”
His best friend betrayed him. He left me. He deceived people: me, my mother.
“How could you do that to us?”
