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“But look at me. I haven’t slept in days, I’m a mess.”
“And I’m sure they will still love you regardless,” Ava said with a knowing smile.
I thought about it for a moment or two, still not convinced. My stomach twisted and turned at the thought. I was nervous about meeting them and had wanted our first meeting to be special; a happy moment when we reunited and they got to see me at my best, not my lowest.
As if Ava could read my mind, however, she said, “Isn’t that what family is for?”
“What do you mean?”
“To love you regardless, to pick you back up when you’re down, to have your back?”
“Yes, but I hardly know these people. And we’re not one hundred percent sure yet they’re my family.”
“Based on what you’ve told me, I don’t think it’s going to matter too much. They already love and adore you.”
“But what if they don’t?” And that right there was the crux of it. My fear of rejection. This was my last chance at having a family that adored me, that cared about me the way parents should. And what if they didn’t?
“Well, you still have us,” Ava said matter-of-factly. “Gabe and I are your family now.”
Hearing her say those words warmed something inside of me. I studied my best friend for a long time before saying anything.
“So you really are okay with Gabe and me being together?” I asked.
Ava looked over at me with a raised brow. “You really have to ask me that?”
“Well, yeah, you and I haven’t really talked much about it since our initial conversation months ago. You haven’t said much since.”
“Because there wasn’t much to say. I think it works beautifully. Seeing the two of you together has made me realize how perfect you are for each other. My brother clearly adores you, and you two make an awesome pair. Watching you guys parent and deal with all of this together, it’s serious relationship goals for me.”
It felt like my eyes were constantly watering, mostly sad tears over the last couple of days, but that time, they were tears of happiness. I looked over at Ava and managed to choke out the words, “Thank you. I really needed to hear that.”
“We’re family, Bella, and there’s nothing that’s ever going to change that. Nothing you can do or say will change that for me. I love you, bestie.”
“I love you too,” I said.
We shared a smile and drove in silence for a minute or two.
“So we’re in agreement then? We’re going to see your family? Because I’m almost to their town.”
I took a few deep breaths and thought about it. What was the worst that could happen? They rejected me, and I went back no worse than I was before? I still had Ava and Gabe; we had created a family together. And best-case scenario? I could confide in people who truly understood what I was going through and get to meet my probable birth family.
“Let’s do this,” I said, taking out my phone and calling Charles.
37
Gabe
We had to strategize so we went over to Roman’s penthouse apartment.
“Roman and I worked security for Tony about six months ago, for his sixtieth birthday celebration,” Dante said.
“Not much has changed,” Roman added. “Tony remodeled the kitchen, and added a sauna, but nothing that changes the fundamental layout of the property.”
Roman doodled a little map on a piece of paper with Dante pointing out possible entry locations for us. Getting inside was only half the battle. Knowing Tony, that place was crawling with security. He lived a dangerous life and a lot of folks wanted him dead. One of the many reasons I left that life behind was because I didn’t want to live in a house with constant security detail, feeling like every friend might one day turn on me and try to kill me.
“Does his team have any significant uniforms or anything?” I asked.
“Nothing in particular. Just all black, typically.”
