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Well, fine. So I won’t be the most popular hockey player on the team. I never was, really. Sometimes a man has to take a stand. Even if it’s not a popular one.
I let go of him and step away. He stays, leaned against the locker. Like I thought, he’s in no condition to try and come after me.
“If they’re smart enough to think for themselves, I might be interested. If they just go with whatever you say, then they can think I’m an alien for all I care.”
“We’re not friends anymore,” Cash calls after me, his voice gradually rising as I walk out the door. “All of that’s dead! Don’t come begging for forgiveness! And don’t expect me to go easy on you because the two of us used to hang out! You’re nothing to me now! Less than nothing!”
If Cash keeps going, I don’t hear it. I am outside already, and I decide that now might be a good time to take a walk.
Obviously, I tried to put up a brave face while I was arguing with Cash. But at the same time, I can’t help but also be a little worried. Cash was one of the best friends I made at college. The two of us just clicked. And now that I think about it, most of the other friends I have, I made through him in one way or another. Cash is friendly in a way I’ve just never been.
So what is going to happen when he turns against me? Am I going to be totally on my own? Me and Wren against the whole world?
If I’m going to be stuck with just one other person against everyone else, I’m glad that it’s Wren. Still, the whole thing scares me. I spent enough time in boarding school being alone and disliked. I don’t want to do it anymore. Not in college. Not now.
“Hey, Hunter!” a voice calls. “What’s going on with you?”
I turn to see Johnny, the left forward on the hockey team walking toward me. The big smile on his face tells me he hasn’t heard the news yet.
“Good to see you,” I say, nodding. “How are you?”
“Tired of stats homework,” he replies cheerfully. “But I’ll make it. You sound like something’s got you down? You alright?”
Johnny’s one of the ones who I’m sure will turn against me the moment Cash tells him to. He’s a nice enough guy, but he doesn’t like standing up for much of anything. The kind of guy who fades comfortably into the background.
“There’s been some drama between me and Cash,” I tell him. “Hopefully, we work it out between us, but I’m worried it might blow up into something bigger.”
He shrugs. “Is this about that girl? What’s her name? Wren?”
“You heard about it, huh?”
“Don’t sweat it,” he says, patting me on the shoulder. “Girls are always trouble, but you and Cash are bros. I’m sure the two of you will figure something out.”
I clench my jaw slightly but decide not to make an issue of it. I’m enjoying this last farewell to my old friendships too much to mess it up.
Am I just making the same old mistakes again? Being too possessive, too protective? Throwing away good friendships and betting everything on one romance? It’s definitely the kind of situation I told myself I wouldn’t get into in college. But then, I remember Wren’s face when she was talking about what Cash had done to her. I remember the feeling of her lips against mine, and the promise I made to her under the tree.
Even if it’s the wrong choice, I’m still gonna make it. I don’t care. This is the person I want to be.
“You’re probably right,” I say. “We’ve definitely weathered our share of arguments before.”
“And besides, we’re gonna need both of you in top form if we’re gonna win our next game against Northeastern. They’ve got a fierce offense.”
“They’ve got fierce offensive players,” I correct him. “But they don’t work together that well. Too showboaty. I think we can take them, no problem.”
“Well, there we go,” Johnny says, smiling. “There’s the Hunter we all know and love.
At that moment, his pocket starts buzzing. He reaches in and pulls out his cell phone. “Would you look at that? Cash is calling me right now. Maybe I can help talk him into making things up with you.”
I nod. “That would be great if you can. I’ll catch you later.”
I walk away quickly while he answers the phone. I want to get out of view before he understands exactly what I just did.
It feels like everything is happening too fast and that I’m not getting any choice in it. It feels like I’m doing the only thing that makes sense, and yet, everything keeps falling apart around me.
At least I have Wren. Every once and a while, I ask myself if she’s really worth all of this. But every time I do, another part of me answers before I can even think about it.
Yes. Yes, of course she is.
