Page 126 of That First Date


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“Always, baby.”

“I’m scared,” she admits, stepping out of my hold. I allow her a moment to take a deep breath and continue. “I don’t know how to navigate this, us, and I don’t know how to handle these… feelings.”

I wrap my arms around her, bringing her head to my chest. I press a light kiss to her cheek and whisper, “I know.”

“I’m sorry, Marc. I never meant lead you on and have you fall for a broken girl like me.”

I pull back, brushing a strand of loose hair around her ear. “There isnothingbroken about you. I don’t ever want to hear you say that about yourself again.”

“But I am. My dad fucked me up so much when he walked out on my mom and me. I vowed I’d never allow a man the power to walk out on me again. We allowed ourselves to get too deep. It scares the shit out of me, Marc.”

“Let me go through this with you. Let me carry some of that fear. Let me show you that you never have to worry about me doing that to you.” I press a kiss to her forehead again. “I’m all in with you.”

She doesn’t reply but offers me a hesitant smile. I can see my words swirling around in her head as if she has to digest them and figure out what she wants to say back.

“Bill is sending me away this weekend for a week.” I decide to add in my attempt to break down any thoughts she has. “I have to go to Austin for CEO training. Would you want to come with me?”

Her smile slowly falls into a frown, and my chest tightens with worry that this is it. This is the end. She can’t do this with me. My stomach drops so fast it causes me to lose my breath.

“I can’t,” she finally says.

I nod in response, my throat constricts, taking away my ability tobegherto come with me.

She laughs. “Fix your face, boss man.”

“Excuse me?” The sound of her laughter is so contagious that it causes me to laugh with her.

“This works out well. You going away for a week allows me to stew in my thoughts. Get my shit together with some space between us. Maybe even start talking to a professional about getting over this deep-rooted fear I have inside of me.”

“Yeah?”

“I don’t feel like I deserve you, you know. And what it boils down to is that I want to. I want to be worthy of whatever you have to give me. And you shouldn’t have to put up with someone who is living a life scared of the possibility of you walking out. You shouldn’t have to wake up every single daytryingto prove it to me either.”

“Avery—”

“Trust me on this. Please,” she begs, hands gripping my biceps in an attempt to make me understand.

The truth of the matter is, I do understand. I don’t want to live like that either. I don’t want to live in fear that if I do one thing wrong, it’s going to break her. I know beneath whatever is going on in her head, is a girl who’s stronger than her fragile exterior shows.

“Ok.”

The only word I have in response.

I just have to get through this one week without her and hold onto hope that when I return, we can make this work.

“Why do you look like your cat died?” Oliver says.

“What the hell is up with everyone saying that?” I snap. “I. Am. A. Dog. Guy. I can’t stand cats. They shit in gross litter and stink.”

“Well… okay then,” Logan says behind his glass of whiskey. “In an attempt to defend the feline species here, they are also wildly independent creatures.”

Oliver almost spits out his drink at his response.

“You two are assholes.”

“But really, what’s wrong with you today?”

I direct my gaze to Logan. “I got the company.”

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