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Prologue
It all happened so fast. One minute I’m sitting in the front stretch of the grand stands cheering on my Daddy, and the next moment the world is on fire. Well maybe not the entire world, but most certainlymyworld. Been that way since my mama died when I was only four. My Daddy is the sun in my day, the waves in my ocean, the beat in my heart.
I’m on my feet, screaming, tears burning my cheeks as I watch medics and men pull a big white sheet over my Daddy on the ground. My prayers for hope quickly turn into ragged cries of “no!” but before I can get down there, big hands are on my arms, dragging me away, telling me it’s going to be okay. But how can anything ever be okay now?
They pull me toward a tent, and over my shoulder I see Daddy’s shiny orange Camaro, looking more like a crushed soda can than the vehicle used to win plenty of Nascar races. “I painted her orange, after you, my girl,” he told me the first time he took me to the track to his car.“Sweet Clementine, you are my good luck charm, and now you’ll be with me out there on the track, bringing me all the good fortune in the world. Because that’s what you do Clem, you make my life richer and better.”
I wassupposedto be his good luck charm.
Those same hands that grabbed me are pushing me into a chair; someone’s even pressing a cup of water to my lips. A woman’s hand strokes hair off my forehead and all around me, they’re saying things, talking like I’m not here.
She doesn’t have anyone else.
It’s been her and her daddy since she was just a little girl.
Her grandmama can’t take care of her– she’s in a home.
Poor thing is too young to be without both her parents.
My mind is spinning like a top and I don’t know which way is up or down, but when Miss May appears crouched at my feet, I manage to snap out of it. She’s been my Daddy’s manager for so long, she’s like family.
“Clementine, my darling, don’t you worry, alright? I’m gonna help you figure it all out. Now let’s get you away from all this.” She loops her arm through mine and pulls me to my feet. Next thing I know she’s batting people away and swatting at cameras who call out to me.
“Clementine! Clem!”
“Miss Clark!”
I keep my head down and my feet moving, then Miss May is pushing me into the backseat of a town car. Her phone sings a happy tune, and the upbeat chirping makes my tummy roll. Will I ever be happy or upbeat again? How can I be now that I lost the most important man in the world?
“Hi Rhett,” Miss May says quietly into the receiver, giving me half of her back. Her head bobs as a deep murmur fills the cab of the car, coming from the phone. A beat passes, then the fair haired woman turns to me, blinking and nodding as she listens. “Are you three okay? How’re Banks and Holden?” Her head bobs as her eyes pinch closed, pain etched into her face. She opens her eyes, and they’re wet like mine. “Alright then. I’m taking her home.”
She ends the call and lets her weathered hand come to my knee. With a gentle squeeze and hushed tone she says, “I’m taking you home, Clementine.”
“How are they?” I ask between sobs, because I know I’m hurting buttheyare too.Theybeing Rhett, Banks and Holden, the men that have been my Daddy’s pit crew since I was a little girl. I grew up with them around, and even though we don’t share blood, I’ve been calling them my uncles since I can remember. I think of how much their hearts are aching right now, too. My head falls against the window and my eyes close as tears streak my cheeks, and wet my neck, soaking into my shirt.
Miss May doesn't answer, but nods to the driver, repeating herself again. “Take us to her home.”
I may still have a house, but without my Daddy, I don’t have a home.
ChapterOne
ONE YEAR LATER
“Igot my high school diploma today, Daddy. And I know you’re up there, smiling, proud as can be.” I trace his name with the tip of my finger, over and over as I talk to him, like I always do when I visit. “Miss May is moving out now that I’m an adult. Said she can’t live with me forever, and I don’t expect her to.” I let out a sigh that could move the world, I swear. “I understand, I’m just… not ready to be alone.”
A shiny black town car rolls up to the curb, and I peek at my watch because how has it already been an hour? That’s how much time Miss May gives me at the cemetery. She says any longer than that is morbid. The door flies open and her wild white hair lifts with the wind as she pokes her head out.
“C’mon Clementine, it’s time to go.”
I stroke my hand over his name just one more time, and get to my feet. I trudge through the damp lawn to the car, clambering inside just as the rain begins.
“Good news,” she says, rolling on red lipstick while peering at herself in a gold compact. She snaps it shut and drops it with a plunk into her designer handbag. “I know you're not wantin’ to live alone, so I solved your problem.”
Unless she knows some magical spell that’s gonna bring my Daddy back, I can’t imagine how she could’ve solved my problems. “I can’t live in the old folks home with Granny! She has a twin bed!”
Miss May rolls her eyes, but not in a mean way. She’s never been mean, and that’s why I don’t want her to leave. I love her. “Of course you’re not living in a retirement home, Clem. Don’t be silly.”
I curl my fingers around the hem of my corduroy skirt, my tummy feeling really nervous all of a sudden. “Am I gonna have to sell the house?” I can’t leave there. I can still smell him in the halls if I try real hard.
