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I should be celebrating, not being scolded like I’m a child.
Max seems to take a minute, and I think he’s trying to calm down. Maybe some of his anger is rolled in fear after not finding me where he left me. I suspect it at least, but he seems to fail in his attempt to be calmer, even if his voice comes at a smidge more even. “ You won’t be much help to any of your pack members if you get yourself killed.”
Ironic that he’s telling me what to do.“Says the shifter whose ass I had to save the last time we got into a scrap.”
Orson lifts his eyebrows and smirks furtively like a schoolboy watching an incipient playground fight. Braxton flushes from embarrassment because he remembers I saved his ass, too.That’s right, boys. Sometimes I’m in the mood to listen and follow orders, but when I have better things to do, I won’t. And don’t you forget it… along with the fact that in many ways, I’m more powerful than all of you combined.
Sensing the performance aspect of our tiff, Max marches past me towards the treeline. “Asha, a word?”
With a groan, I follow him. We reconvene in the backyard of a dead couple’s home, their bodies splayed in the grass, arms cast over their heads as though in grim invitation to use their lawn for our private aside. At a whispering volume, Max says, “You need to start trusting me, Asha.”
Oh, shit. This is not what I want to hear. These are the things that get my walls to crumble, and if they crumble, he’s going to find it easy to dig out the truth from me. And I won’t be the reason thatany moreof my pack members die.
So, I need to focus on my anger. Something that isn’t that hard to do, even if my anger isn’t directed at Max, at least not deep down.
Deep breath.“What sign have I given you that I distrust you?” I questioned defensively. “If I recall correctly, I wasverytrusting last night.” The second the words pop out of my mouth, I want to take them back, but it’s too late.
His brow furrows, and he cocks his head back. “Quite the mental gymnastics to use your own vulnerability against me in an argument. If that had been an indication of your trust, you’d be less recalcitrant today.”
I scoff. “Recalcitrant?What are you, an English teacher with an authority complex? I told you I wouldn’t wait. Fair warning.” Even though hehadgone with me andhadlet me go ahead, not waiting for the Enforcers.Technically.
Max huffs. “We keep a chain of command for a reason.”
“Right, and where does your chain of command terminate, Max? It’s not with you, is it?”
He shakes his head. “You know the answer to that.”
It’s not enough. He’s still waiting. Still expecting an answer. Whatever I’ve said so far hasn’t been enough to end this miserable conversation, so I need to push harder.
I lean closer, adopting his low, urgent whisper. “Who has your loyalty, Max? Is it me? Or is it the Enforcers? You know damn well it can’t be both.”
He wears an indignant sneer. “What about you? Do your loyalties lie with us or with your pack?”
“I thought we were a pack.”
Fuck. Did I really use his sweet words against him?This isn’t fun. In trying to hide the truth, I’m acting like a complete bitch, and I don’t seem to be able to stop.
“Yeah, well, what’s one pack worth when you have multiple?” He sounds hurt as he turns away, staring off for a moment into the forest.
Damn it. I hate this.I don’t know what I wanted, but it wasn’t this.
Then he whirls back and asks, “The Blood Mage who did this... do you know where they are?”
Did he seriously just ask me that?I merely glare back at him, resenting the implication that I would actively work against him. Even if Itechnicallylet my brother go before, and I’mtechnicallylying right now. Actually, I keep glaring, because I’m in an ethically gray zone that seems to be darkening by the second, and I can’t show even the smallest sign of weakness.
Max raises his arm and points towards the house. “You know what’s in there?”
I refuse to give him any kind of answer because I don’t like his tone and don’t know where he’s going with this. Not that I think that will get him to stop. Max is a dog with a bone when he gets going like this.
“You want to see?” He takes me by the arm and drags me up to the house.
We have to step over the bodies of the two adults to enter through the backdoor, but once inside, I discover the diminutive corpses of two children. It’s a little boy and girl, most likely siblings, most likely the children of the dead parents outside. I don’t want to envision it, but a scene appears on the stage of my mind, the parents putting themselves before their children in a futile attempt to save their kids. Then they’re struck down, in front of the children, whose lives end seconds later.
A cold shiver races down my spine and I fight against a swell of emotion threatening to erode my composure. “You see what this person has done? Whatever your feelings about the Raven Pack, I hope you’re not too far gone to condemn the lives of children for the sins of their parents. Is this really a person you want to protect?”
I want to rebuke him for the suggestion, but I’m locked in a battle with an approaching breakdown.
Max seizes my arm again, ostensibly to drag me to another horrific scene, but suddenly Braxton appears. “Enough.”
