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And God damn…
Already my cock is tightening again.
I may not have to wait that long to have her in my bed. To fuck her.
No, to make love to her.
This isn’t just a fuck to me anymore.
It hasn’t been since I brought her here.
Once I let her in—not just into my apartment but into my bedroom—it became something more.
And there’s no turning back.
I take her hands, pull her to her feet, and hold her close. “That was amazing,” I whisper into her ear.
She melts against me, kisses my chest. “I’ve never done that before—let a man come in my mouth.”
A low groan vibrates out of me, and my dick twitches. Just that admission—the fact that she’s never swallowed for anyone—has me ready to go again.
My God, the feel of her lips and of her flesh molded to mine.
Have I ever felt this way? With Allison? With Teresa?
And then it hits me.
I haven’t.
And that doesn’t mean I loved Allison any less.
“Frankie,” I say.
“Hmm?” she mumbles against my skin.
“I want to tell you something.”
She pulls away then, her eyes wide. “Of course. What?”
“Sit with me.” I bring her to the bed and pull her onto my lap.
Her knees are red. I touch them gently. “Okay?”
“I’m fine. Thank you for the pillow. It helped.”
“I’m glad.”
She kisses my cheek. “What do you want to tell me?”
“I realize something, and it’s probably something I should’ve realized long ago. When I was with Teresa, I was trying to recreate what I had with Allison.”
“Relationships are always different,” she says.
“Exactly, but I didn’t know that at the time. I was in my twenties, so I should have, but the only significant relationship I’d ever had was with Allison. It was so good in so many ways, and I was lost when she was taken from me. After years of mourning, when I felt I was ready to look for someone new, I was expecting it to be exactly the same.”
“But it wasn’t.”
“No, not at all. Parts of it felt the same, but other parts…”
“She wasn’t Allison.”
“No, she wasn’t. And she kept parts of herself hidden—parts that didn’t come out until later—and that’s when…”
It’s still so painful to think about. To talk about.
“She broke your heart.”
“In a way, I suppose she did. She turned on me. Told her friends about our private life—laughed with them about it, even—when she knew how much my privacy meant to me. Once I saw her for who she really was, I realized that our whole relationship was a farce.”
“I’m sorry that happened, Hunter. You deserve better than that. So that’s why you decided to give up on relationships.”
“I did. And I honestly don’t regret it. It was the right decision for me at the time.”
“And now?” She raises her eyebrows.
“It’s different with you. Different from Allison. That doesn’t make it any less special.”
She smiles, her lips still glistening. “Thank you for saying that.”
“You don’t have to thank me. It’s the truth. The truth I just realized myself. That was what the whole relationship with Teresa was. It was me trying to recreate what I had with Allison. But that was impossible. Quite honestly, it was probably just as much my fault that our relationship ended. I’d convinced myself that Teresa was something that she wasn’t.”
“Maybe. But don’t put that on yourself.”
“It doesn’t matter. It’s ancient history. But I’m hoping…” I clear my throat, gathering my courage. “I’m hoping…that you and I can have something. Something unique. I’m no longer trying to recreate something from the past. I’m interested in the present now.”
And in the future.
But I don’t say those last words. It’s too soon to think about the future, and I don’t want to scare her away.
Hell, I don’t want to scare myself away.
Only months ago, I felt content with scenes that were merely physical. With women for whom I had no feelings other than sexual.
And now?
This beautiful woman with the hypnotizing eyes has changed everything.
Will she accept me for who I truly am?
Will the club still be a big part of our lives?
Already I know that whatever happens, it will be a compromise.
I’m okay with that.
Because this woman means something to me. Something very special.
I can almost put it into words…
But I’m not quite there yet.
I kiss the tops of her breasts, play with her nipples, and then I lie down on my back, pulling her with me.
We lie on the bed for a few moments, and she snuggles into my shoulder.
And for the first time in a long time, I feel completely relaxed.
Chapter Forty-One
Frankie
I wake to the sun streaming into the bedroom window.
For a moment I don’t know where I am, but then I feel Hunter’s hard body next to mine.
We’re covered, and I don’t remember how we got in bed. Perhaps I fell asleep and he covered me.
Sometimes it’s difficult to believe that such a gentle soul is a Dominant. But I’ve learned through my research—and through interacting with Hunter—that being a Dominant doesn’t mean you have to be domineering in every part of your life. Hunter is a gentle soul. A student of love and language. Hunter is a Dominant. The two aren’t mutually exclusive.
