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“I don’t think that’s a good idea…” I trail off, hoping she takes the hint. I love my mom, I really do, but she doesn’t give the best first impression. Or the second. Or the third. Likeable is not a word I would use to describe her.
Before the words leave my mouth, I realize that Elowyn is going to take them the wrong way. What she doesn’t know is that I’m not trying to protect my mom fromher, I’m trying to protect her from my mom.
“Parents love me,” she insists. I’m sure they do. That isn’t the problem. “It’s an awesome idea. She and I will be great friends.”
She reaches across and places her hand in mine, lacing our fingers together.
I watch her, choosing my next words carefully. “Not sure my mom is like normal parents.”
“Please.” She rolls her eyes, already getting up off of the couch and putting our plates in the sink. “My parents named me Elowyn. I don’t think they’re like normal parents either. Besides, if she made you, she can’t be half-bad. Not even a quarter bad. Maybe an eighth bad, and even then, that would be pushing it.”
A heavy sigh escapes. “Alright, fine. I give. But if you’re coming with, we gotta leave in twenty.”
She races off to the bathroom to get ready, and I wish I could share in her excitement. Instead, there’s a gnawing sensation in the pit of my stomach. Things are going so well here—I don’t want my mom to scare Elowyn off before we even have a chance to get going. I can’t lose this feeling before I’ve even had it a month. I also haven’t brought a girl home in years, sticking to one-night stands and late-night hookups with women I barely know. I still remember when Mom made my senior homecoming date cry about her hair, ruining a night that I spent my entire savings trying to orchestrate. I’ve learned my lesson since then.
I’ve also learned that it’s never wise to fight with a woman, especially not Mom. I guess that extends to Elowyn, too. But I don’t think I mind all that much where she is concerned. Elowyn gives more than she takes, and that’s new to me. Honestly, I don’t know how I was getting by without her. I’d shut myself off from everyone, protecting myself and those around me by not letting anyone in. I didn’t even mean to let her in. She sort of broke in on her own, like a stray kitten on my doorstep all floofy and spicy and mewling her every demand. For the first time in my life, I got chosen. Everything feels different, being with her. Brighter somehow. I don’t have to carry everything on my own. So maybe bringing her along today isn’t the worst idea. This is my life, and it will be interesting to see how she fits.
Despite giving in so easily and even after giving myself a firm internal pep talk, I’m nervous as hell the entire ride to my mom’s house. Elowyn’s hand sits on top of mine on the center console, but she doesn’t try to talk to me or convince me that things are going to be fine. In her mind, they will be. She’s not tense or worry-ridden as if she could be a mother-in-law whisperer. Instead, she comforts me just by being there.
Her gentle fingers stroke my skin, and I almost forget how my mom has become too adept at pushing my buttons. “Do you want me to come in with you?”
“Nah,” I say, putting the car in park and turning down the radio. I haven’t been around this week, not since the last time we went to the doctor, so I have no idea how messy the house is on the inside. And I don’t want to embarrass my mom. “She doesn’t like surprise visitors. Just go ahead and wait here. I’ll leave the car running, shouldn’t be more than a few minutes.”
Once I step over the threshold, I’m happy I left Elowyn in the car. The house is in shambles. Plates and TV dinner trays are tossed haphazardly on the kitchen counters and the whole place smells like an ashtray. Mom doesn’t say anything on the way out to the car, but I know that she’s going to blame the mess on me not being there. I’m relieved to see that Elowyn climbed out of the front seat, taking the back passenger side and leaving the door open for my mom.
“Hi, Mrs. Langmore,” she says politely after my mom gets settled in her seat. Leaning forward, she offers her hand for a handshake, but Mom doesn’t acknowledge it. “I’m Elowyn. I work with Weston.”
My mom’s superior gaze sweeps Elowyn’s body through the mirror in her sun visor and her forehead wrinkles. “Oh, they have you trapped in that shithole, too? If you don’t mind me saying, you seem pretty uppity for that. By the way, it’s Gail. I haven’t been Mrs. Langmore for years.”
“It’s an honest way to make a living while I figure things out.” Elowyn laughs off her barb before I can try to defend her. She doesn’t seem too rattled yet. “I’m so happy to finally meet you. Weston says such nice things about you.”
“Really?” Mom scoffs. She still hasn’t turned to look at her, and it’s driving me insane. Why does this woman who gave birth to me have to be such a damn embarrassment all the time? Elowyn’s mere presence indicates she means something to me. “I assumed he just told everyone in earshot what a burden I am.”
“Of course not. I’ve never met a guy who cares about his mom this much,” Elowyn insists. “But he did neglect to tell me just what a wickedly dry sense of humor you have.”
Mom’s testing her, trying to find a weak spot. And so far, Elowyn hasn’t shown a single one, pointedly never taking the bait or stooping to her level. I’m impressed. Usually, by now, the conversation would’ve died off entirely, but Elowyn spends the entire car ride asking my mom questions about how she’s been lately and what I was like as a kid. Forget expert gift giver, Elowyn could be a politician and get every vote in Minnesota. Even when Mom told her that I was the loudest baby in the hospital and how much the nurses hated me crying to the point they asked if I could be shoved back in, Elowyn didn’t flinch. Just said that I was expressive and probably just testing out my lungs.
I pull her to the side when we get to the doctor, taking a minute to ourselves while my mom is busy being tested. “Thanks for keeping your cool. I know Mom can be a little rough around the edges.”
“Please. You think working in a bar is bad? I’ve worked in a pharmacy.” Elowyn lowers her voice, rolling her eyes. “I’ve dealt with enough cranky older people to last a lifetime. Don’t even get me started on people addicted to painkillers. You try telling someone their doctor really sent their prescription to a Walgreens across town, or that we don’t carry their brand of fiber supplement anymore. A guy chucked a bottle of magnesium citrate at my head once bitching about how stool has been stuck inside his bowel cavity for over a month. I have the hide of a rhino and the patience of a saint.” She pauses, hearing the door to the exam room opening next to us, before speaking her next words just loud enough for me to hear. “Gail is going to like me, or I’m going to die trying.”
“Oh, good,” Mom huffs, nodding in our direction. “Now I can hear when they talk about me.”
“Nothing gets past you,” Elowyn teases, and I swear to God, my mom almost smiles. But then she catches herself. Even though her eyes dance like I haven’t seen them in a long time, she clamps her lips together out of pure stubbornness. “C’mon, we should go grab something to eat. You look like you need a sandwich, girl. You must be starving. I know I am.”
There is no discussion of where anyone would like to go. Mom only ever wants to eat at her job, this ancient little diner on the other side of town with stale burger buns, burnt coffee, and fries that taste like old grease. I can never tell if it’s because she wants the extra attention from the staff, or if it’s because she’s too scared to try anything not familiar. Probably a bit of both. The drive there is even more uncomfortable than the ride to the doctor, Mom spends the entire time complaining about either the staff at the doctor’s office, the price and quality of the hearing aid, or the way that I drive.
She’s so nice to everyone at the diner that it makes my head spin. I forget how charming she can be when she wants to be. The woman who my dad fell in love with is still in there, sometimes hidden away, so it just gets harder and harder to see her. Everything goes right back to hell when Elowyn’s burger and onion rings arrive, and Mom has the gall to ask if she’s really going to eat all of that.
“Don’t worry, I’ve always had a healthy appetite,” Elowyn reassures her with a tight, fake grin. “And working at that bar is more than enough of a workout. Besides, dinner is on me tonight. I can’t have Weston paying for anything right now, not until the insurance comes through.”
“What insurance?” Mom asks, lightning quick.
Crap. I hadn’t told her about the fire. Elowyn’s eyes go wide with regret, immediately realizing her mistake.
With a flick of my wrist, I lie through my teeth. “My apartment caught on fire last week. Nothing major. Just a kitchen fire. They’re pretty sure it was a wiring issue.”
“That’s bullshit and you know it, Weston,” Mom sneers. “You probably just left something on while you were high or beating off into a Kleenex like you used to do back in junior high. Or God only knows what else.”
