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They loved me. They wanted to be with me, to move their entire lives to be close to me.
“You want to move to New York? All of you? Are you serious?” But it was clear just how serious they were. There was no doubt in their eyes, no hesitation. In disbelief, I shook my head. “How can you be so sure?”
“We’ve known you for years, Jess,” Vincent said. “We’ve seen it all. We’ve seen your worst, you’ve seen ours. We want the opportunity to show you the best of us.”
“We want you to be ours,” Manson said. “I lost you once, Jess. I can’t do it again. I can’t watch more years go by without you in my life, wondering where you are, if you’re happy, if you’re safe...I just can’t.”
Lucas cleared his throat again as he reached for me. He seemed unsure of where to touch; his fingers hovered over my lips before they brushed my cheek.
“I don’t want you to leave,” he said, his voice barely loud enough to hear. “You’ve gone and gotten me attached to you, Jess. You’re stuck with me. With all of us.”
“We want to take you on a date,” Vincent said. “A proper date, a real one. We want to take you to Tris.”
“The club,” I said. Giddy excitement, fraught with nerves, trembled through my chest. Tris wasn’t only the nightclub Vincent worked in, it was also where he and Manson had learned to practice BDSM safely. It had been a haven for the four as they found community.
“We want to show you more of our world,” Jason said.
“We want more adventures,” Vincent said.
“More challenges,” Lucas added with a smirk.
“We want you,” Manson said. “To be part of us. Will you?”
It wasn’t necessary to consider my answer, but I paused for a moment anyway: to take a breath, to let it sink in that this was my reality. That everything, truly, had changed.
“Yes, I will,” I said. “Absolutely.”
39 - Vincent
We were all on pinsand needles waiting to hear the results of Jess’s work review. My confidence for her was sky-high; our girl was a force to be reckoned with, an artist, a verifiable badass. Hoping it would give her a little boost for the day, I texted her as much first thing in the morning. Her stomach was in knots, despite her recent efforts to hide how nervous she was about the review.
She was doubting herself, but I didn’t want her to have a single doubt in the world. Everything she had done so far would pale compared to what she was capable of, and I wanted her to know that.
When I loved someone — and I loved her down to the very depths of my soul, if I had one — I wanted them to feel like they could take on anything. Like they could do anything,beanything. When my partners thrived, so did I. My optimism could grate on some people’s nerves, but I would rather be known as annoyingly positive than risk dragging anyone down, especially those I cared about.
When Jess finally called my phone, about five minutes after noon, I shouted as loudly as I could. “Jess is calling! We’ve got an update, boys!”
