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I nodded again, my cock twitching with eagerness to be inside her. She nudged herself against my mouth, grinding her pussy on my tongue. “Of course that’s what you want, you pervert.” She sucked in her breath, looking down at me with a wicked gleam in her eye before she spat on my face.
That unleashed the beast, and there was no getting it back in its cage once it was free. I rose up so fast that she yelped, as I lifted her entirely off the bed and impaled her on my cock. She grabbed hold of my shoulders, her legs wrapping tightly around me as I clutched her hips and fucked her hard.
“I fucking warned you not to get used to it,” I snarled, ignoring her pleading cries as her pussy squeezed around me. Her eyes rolled back as she came, helpless groans punctuating every thrust. I didn’t last much longer than she did.
I pressed inside her as deep as I could as I came, holding her there so not a single drop could escape from inside her. It was some primal bullshit but I couldn’t get enough of that — filling her up, pumping her full of my essence and leaving her marked with my cum.
My strength was sapped, and I sunk down into the grass and took her with me. Her legs straddled me and she laid her chest against mine, my cock still inside her. Our deep breaths swelled in unison for a few minutes as we lay there silently, eyes closed, surrounded by the soft sound of the breeze and twittering birds.
After several minutes of silence, she shifted to roll off of me and lie in the grass beside me. She snuggled close against me, resting her head on my shoulder as I wrapped my arm around her back.
“Lucas?” Her voice was soft, and surprisingly vulnerable. I tucked my free arm behind my head so I could look at her better.
“What happened today...it’s not the first time people have done shit like this to you,” she said. Her eyes kept darting away, as if she wanted so badly to lower them but was forcing herself not to do it. “I know that...I’ve done things to you, said things about you, that were just as unfair as what happened today. And I regret it so much. I wish I could take it back.”
She took a deep breath, and held it for a moment. I could hardly believe what I was hearing. An apology? For me? Fromher?
People didn’t apologize to me for shit, but I also didn’t welcome apologies in the first place. I didn’t forgive people. There was no point.
With Jess, I’d figured the past was the past. I wasn’t going to pretend I was an innocent victim; I’d had a hand in more than my fair share of trouble. She’d been a bitch back then and hadn’t been much better when we reunited...at first.
Somehow, against my better judgment, I think I’d forgiven her without even realizing it. But now that she was actually apologizing, I could see the worry all over her face. The fear that she’d wrenched herself open, forced herself to be vulnerable, even though the result might hurt.
She didn’t expect me to forgive her. She couldn’t even look at me anymore.
I sat up, and she did too. “Okay, hold up — I have to put my dick away for this.” It was a relief when my comment got a tiny laugh out of her. I was uncomfortable as hell with conversations like this. Frankly, I couldn’t remember the last time anyone had apologized to me, and I didn’t know what to do with it now that she had.
She was plucking at the grass, nervously pinching the blades between her fingers. I needed to say something, but I had to figure out what the hell I was feeling first. I wasn’t angry. I was nervous, because I was confused and caught off guard. But I felt...
Relieved? Validated? Assured? I didn’t know what the hell to call it, but it wasn’t a bad feeling.
“You don’t have to forgive me,” she said quickly, cutting me off when I opened my mouth to respond. “I realize that apologizing puts you on the spot to have some kind of response for it, and you don’t have to. I just wanted you to know. I really am sorry.”
“Shit, Jess.” I rubbed the back of my head, trying to come up with the right words. I didn’t know the first thing about accepting an apology, so I tried to think of how Manson reacted when I apologized to him. “I get it. I mean, I can be a major dick too. I think when...when you’ve spent a lot of time feeling out of control, feeling like other people are running your life, you’ll end up doing almost anything to take some of that control back. Even if it means turning around and hurting other people. Doesn’t make it okay...” I looked over at her and found her watching me. Waiting, with this look of hopeful vulnerability on her face that made me just want to hold her. “People don’t apologize to me, Jess, so I’m in uncharted territory here, okay? But I accept your apology. Thank you for...for saying that.”
“Actions will mean more than words,” she said, giving me a small smile. “I’ll show you I mean it.”
She was already doing a damn good job of it.
“Come here.” I gathered her up and pulled her between my legs, so I could hold her there with her back against my chest. I rested my head against hers, savoring that sweet strawberry scent in her hair.
“Well, since we’re here confessin’ shit...I guess I’ll tell you something you should probably know. Back in high school, when I smashed that bottle on Alex’s head...it was because he was talking shit about you, Jess.”
She stiffened, and she turned her head to look back at me with a shocked expression. “Wait...what? Lucas, you hated me back then. You couldn’t stand me. Like, I don’t blame you, but...” She shook her head slowly. “Why would you do that?”
I barely understood it myself, but I still had to try to explain. “I suppose I did hate you, about as much as you hated me. But I guess I was a little protective of getting to hate you. When I heard him talking about you, he was bragging about Kyle showing him some photos of you...”
“I knew it,” she hissed. “I fucking knew Kyle showed him. He always denied it.” She closed her eyes for a moment, working through whatever she was feeling in silence. “Why did you...I mean...you got expelled for that, Lucas.”
I shrugged. “I hated that school. I was really only sticking around for the boys anyway. So, you know, I saw the opportunity and took it.”
But she didn’t look like she believed me, at least not the way I was telling it. I wasn’t being entirely truthful either. I didn’t mention how it had made me so fucking furious to hear Alex talk about her that I would have done the same thing even if he’d been my best friend.
“I guess you’ve been guarding me for even longer than I thought, huh?” she said, with the cutest blush rising on her cheeks.
“Guess so. Guard dogs never go off duty,” I said.
I looked at our hands, twined together on her lap. Those fingers of hers were magic, but not only because they could bring pleasure. She knew how to touch me when I was angry, when I was scared. I couldn’t even be sure when she’d learned to do that, or if it was simply natural to her.
