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“I wanted you safe.”
“No,” I spit out. “You wantedyousafe. Let’s start right at the beginning. Care to tell me about my surgery?” There is a lot to unpack with my father. And I’ll gladly stay here for as long as it takes.
When he looks away from me, I realise whatever we thought he had done, was true. My father hurt another girl, in order for me to live.
“I’m not leaving until you answer all my questions. And I don’t want your sob stories. I need the truth.” I don’t shy away. In the past, I may have cowered if my father looked at me the way he is right now. But I’m no longer the little girl wanting to please her father. I can’t be the daughter he raised, because I’m now a woman, and I have my own family to look after.
“Brielle, there are things about this life—”
“There are things about you that you lied about. I was near death, what happened to suddenly bring a miracle into my life and allow me to keep living.” I step closer to my father, and I lean in to make sure he can’t look away from me. “What did you do to that girl?” The question is enunciated slow, steady, and meticulously so that he can’t deny anything. My father knows that I know.
“I wanted you safe.”
“Tell me the fucking truth,” I bite out through clenched teeth, and the surprise on Papa’s face is evident. I’ve never spoken a word out of turn toward him, but I’m done with that because I need to know how I’m alive.
“Emilio’s mother was a woman I was seeing for a few years.” The truth that spills from my father’s mouth has my stomach churning with disgust. “Your mum and I weren’t even talking anymore. Sure, we lived in the same house, but that was it. I… I was lonely and I met—”
“What happened to the little girl?” I cut through his explanation because I don’t want to know the details of how he cheated on my mother. Anger burns through my veins as I pin him with a glare so fierce, it’s surprising he doesn’t shrink back.
“I was desperate. You were my first born, my little girl.”
“I wasn’t your first born though,” I remind him. “Emilio was.”
My father nods. “You were my first and only daughter and I couldn’t lose you. At the time, I was working for the Camorra, and I told the Boss how worried I was about you. I was so deep in their clan I didn’t see a way out. And when he offered to help, I accepted it without a second thought.”
“So you had a child killed, so I could live?” I challenge him then. I feel sick to my stomach listening to this, but I know I have to. There is no other choice because I have to get through the darkness to look to a future with Judah, Kai, and Valen.
“Yes,” he admits with a whisper of agreement. “I made a choice. And I’d make it again, over and over again. There won’t ever be a time I wouldn’t decide to ensure you live, Brielle. I won’t apologise, and I won’t feel guilty for loving you.”
In some ways, I understand it, and in other ways, the heartbreak of what he caused to happen makes me angry. I would do anything for the men I love, but could I kill an innocent to save them. I’m not sure.
“So you ignored your morals to save me? What if I was meant to die? You messed with a natural order of things.”
“Don’t give me that new age shit, Brielle,” Papa spits as he looks up at me, pinning me with a fierce stare. I know where I get my fire from, it’s from him.
“It’s not new age shit to have morals, to feel guilty because a little girl who was innocent, who wasn’t even ill, is now dead because of you.” I step back, the rage taking over me has me trembling, and I have to fist my hands at my sides.
Turning away from him, I focus on the wall on the far side of the room. I feel broken when I think about what my father did, even if he did it to save me. And deep down, I know I can’t forgive him.
“Brielle, I had to do things to ensure you were safe. And when I went to the Veniers, I needed help to keep you alive for as long as humanly possible. Knowing that I may be dead soon, I had to make sure you were safe.”
Spinning on my heel, I stalk toward my father, and look him directly in the eye. “You were so concerned with keeping me safe, but what about Emilio? You couldn’t sit me down and tell me I had a half-brother. At the very least you could have been upfront with me.”
“I know,” he appeases. “I have made far too many mistakes in my life, but the one thing I didn’t make any errors on, is the fact that I know you’re alive, you’re safe, and you’ll have a happy life.”
“Without you,” I add as he finishes his admission. “I want you to tell Judah all the things you told me. I need you to explain how you used me to get to him. Because even though I tried, he needs to hear it from you.”
Dad watches me for a long moment, and then he offers a nod. His gaze drops to my hand, and he smiles. “You’re married now.”
“Yeah,” I whisper. “I got married today. Aren’t you glad you soured the day for me?” I’m acting like an insolent child, but my anger has taken a hold of me and it’s not letting go.
“I’m sorry for everything, Brielle.”
“You know that the Camorra aren’t going to accept apologies. They’ll want to see your head on a chopping block.” I cross my arms, needing some form of stability. And that’s when I feel Judah’s hands slipping around my hips. He doesn’t pull me close, but I know it’s a show of support, of reassurance that he’s with me.
“It’s time for you to come clean. Your daughter, and your son, have been through enough with the lies. I think perhaps you should remember that as their parent, being honest will only serve you in the long run.” Judah’s tone is void of all emotion. He’s angry, I can tell. There’s a chill that races down my spine when Judah releases me and steps toward my father. There is nothing to stop him from killing the man who raised me. Not even I can keep my husband from acting out what has been simmering beneath the surface for so long.
“I give my life for hers. Once I’m gone, she’ll be safe with you.” My father looks at Judah. “I knew she would be because your father made a promise to me.”
