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Staring up into his golden splattered eyes, as I had done so many times before, I knew I had to tell the truth. I knew it was not the time for sarcasm and jokes. It was not the time for evading. I had run to the end of the line. I had no choice but to face it all – my fears, my demons, and him. I put my hands on his wrists, and gently pulled them away from my face.
“I know I’m frustrating. I know I’m hard to love. I’ve always felt like I was never good enough for anyone. I know you feel like I don’t let you in. I know you feel like I have pushed you away. But for me, it hasn’t been that way at all. I have let you into my life, and into my heart. You have opened my eyes to different perspectives, and made me second-guess my beliefs and opinions. You have helped me get through the worst time. You helped me remember how to smile again. If it weren’t for you, I’d still be sitting on Shelly’s recliner having nightmares. You have changed everything for me, and for that I will be eternally grateful. Being around you is not a job. It is a desire. You are a beautiful human, inside and out. You are perfection… and I know I can never measure up to the person you are.” A tear rolled down my cheek.
He held my stare dubiously. “What are you saying?”
“I’m saying… I can never measure up to the person you are, but I can love you with my whole heart… and I hope that can count for something.”
“You love me?”
I swiped the tear from my face. “I do.”
His lips crashed into mine, and all hope for further conversation was lost.
I walked him backwards to the couch, and pulled him down on top of me. We picked up where we had last left off, with my legs wrapped around his body. My mouth begged for his tongue as he teased me with it, slowly and intently tracing my lips. I slid his shirt up to feel the ripple of his abs on my fingertips. He lifted me up and sat me on top of him, changing positions in one swift motion. I felt him through his jeans while he took two handfuls of my ass and pressed me against him. Every part of my body yearned to be touched by him, and where it had been touched tingled with excitement. Our tongues swirled around one another, and I lost track of time as we traveled to a place that seemed so far away from where we were.
We both crashed down to Earth when we heard the knock at my door.
I whined as he slid me off of his lap. “Is this going to happen every time?!”
“It better not,” he grumbled as he flung open the door. I saw his face soften immediately.
“Did Merry like the pie?” My favorite tiny human stepped through the entryway. She ran to me when she spotted me on the couch. “Did you try the pie yet?”
I smiled and hugged her. “I did. It was the best pie I have ever tasted. Thank you for saving me a slice.”
Khloe pulled back from my embrace. “Why are you so sweaty?” She looked up at Chase, who was now standing beside the couch. “Your cheeks look red.”
I stifled a laugh. “I hope we’re not getting sick!”
“Does mom know where you are right now?” the concerned big brother asked.
She nodded her head feverishly. “I told her. Do you think we can have a sleepover tonight, Merry? I don’t have school tomorrow.”
My eyes widened. “You don’t? We should definitely have that sleepover tonight then!”
Chase chuckled. “Why don’t you guys have the sleepover in your room, Khlo?”
She jumped up and down excitedly. “I have a tumble bed! It pulls out from the bottom!”
I laughed. “A trundle bed? That’s awesome. Why don’t I pack some things, and meet you over there in about five minutes? You can get your pajamas on while you’re waiting!”
Khloe ran towards the door. “See you in five minutes!”
“She could have slept here. I don’t mind.” I closed the door behind her.
Chase pulled me in for another kiss. “But if you’re at my house, you can come into my room once she is asleep.”
I smacked him playfully. “I can’t let your parents see me sleeping in your room.”
“Who said anything about sleeping?” He grinned as he stepped outside and swung the door closed.
My skin was still humming as I threw several sleepover essentials into a backpack. I hoped Chase was joking, as we had only just begun telling each other how we felt. What did it all mean? What did it make of us? We were in love, but love makes people do crazy things. Surely it would not happen tonight, in the presence of his sleeping family members. But every interruption only built up more anticipation. Were we ready for a physical relationship? Was I?
I pushed these questions from my mind as I knocked on the Brooks’ door. Khloe greeted me, wearing zebra-striped footie pajamas.
“Slumber party! Slumber party! Slumber party!” she screamed, while jumping up and down.
Beverly poked her head out of the living room, smiling as always. “Come on in, Merritt. We’re about to have a movie night.”
