AllFreeNovel
Share Us
I put a mental pin in it and vow to come back to the subject when Thor isn’t being a raging douche canoe.
I’m sure this goes against every element of submission, but fuck him and the bad mood he rode in on. When he turns and skulks off in the direction of the “normal” family he seems to be pining over, I usher Matthew out and point the car toward home.
Thor can walk off his bad fucking mood by himself.
CHAPTER23
Thor
In hindsight,I probably deserved that.
But I’m still pissed as hell.
The temptation to spend hours propping up the bar at work and drown my sorrows in non-alcoholic beer is strong. The temptation to go somewhere else and drown my sorrows inrealbeer is stronger.
But I vowed I’d never be like my father, and Matty deserves a dad who doesn’t numb his emotions with mood altering substances.
Addison does too.
Staring at my front door for longer than is reasonable, I sigh. I’ve been a dick today. She was trying to help, and I snapped at her. I don’t feel much better in myself, but I need to pull it together and be the man they both need me to be when I step through this door.
CHAPTER24
Addison
Tookhim a few hours to make his way home, and he’s somewhat subdued, but he’s picking up the Lego blocks that somehow exploded all over the kitchen, without complaint.
Matthew has gone to bed. His stimming continued long after we got home from the zoo. He didn’t eat lunch or dinner, he pulled his hair over and over until I was convinced he’d leave himself bald. And when I managed to tease his thick, blond locks from his fingers, he took to rocking back and forth.
All I could do was sit with him and wait until the moment passed. And when it did, he was so worn out he went to bed almost immediately.
Thor grips the countertop with both hands, and drops his head forward with a sigh. My heart twinges. Granted he behaved like a giant man-child at the zoo earlier, he’s going through some things, and I want to be there for him, to take his pain away.
Pressing myself against his back, I wrap my arms around him, planting my palms on his chest as I inhale his musky scent. He smells like fall, campfires and fresh air, crisp leaves and cinnamon.
Grabbing my hands, he pulls my arms around him tighter.
“What do you need, Thor? What can I do?” I’ve struggled with the concept of submissives kneeling for their dominants, but right now? If I thought for one second it would cheer him up even for a moment, I’d kneel at his feet and offer him whatever he wanted. It’s a heady rush through my body that I wasn’t prepared for.
He turns to face me, cupping my face with his warm palms and pressing a hard kiss to my forehead. “What doyouneed, kitten?” He searches my eyes, pain etched across his chiseled features. “I shouldn’t have snapped like that, I’m sorry. You’re great with Matthew. I’ve never doubted your ability to care for him.”
I’m conflicted. The sincerity in his voice, his eyes, in how he holds my face so I stare at him while he speaks, it all makes a direct hit to my chest. Letting my eyes flutter closed with a sigh, I tip my head back. I’m so stressed out, my muscles are tense, my body and mind are highly strung, and I can’t seem to stop the destructive narrative rolling through my head.
He might be trying to retract what he said, but those words landed on my skin like cigarette burns. I already beat myself up enough over being a colossal fuck up without having him join forces with my inner monologue, and my family’s voice in my head.
“I need the noise to stop for just a minute.” Opening my eyes, his are still fixed on me. “Can you quiet my mind for me, Thor?” It’s probably not a fair question, I don’t even know what I’m asking for, what I need, I don’t know where this could lead that would help me quiet my thoughts.
I guess subspace could do the trick, it’s that floaty, happy place submissives go to let themselves just be. I’m not sure I could get there tonight, though. Would spanking help? I feel like if I’m distracted by the sting in my ass I can’t possibly dwell on the stinging in my mind.
And based on how much anger he had buzzing through his body earlier, perhaps letting him take a few slaps out on my ass wouldn’t be the worst thing for him either, right?
The rush of warmth between my thighs tells me my body’s on board. He’s trailing kisses down my neck and across my collar bone while his hands rest on my hips. It’s not enough. There are too many layers between us, too much space, too many emotions hanging in the air around us.
“Thor?”
His head snaps up as his gaze settles on mine.
“Spank me?”
