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"Where's Sylvie?" I scanned the waters surrounding us.
"Right here!" Sylvie answered as she swam up from the opposite side. "Wasn't that amazing? I thought it was so incredible, all the fish and coral. Like a whole other world hidden beneath the surface!"
They swam to the ladder and climbed on, big fins slapping the bottom of the boat as they settled in. The tour guide brought me my drink, and I thanked him with a smile.
"You should have come, Doris. It truly is a wonder. There's still time to go for a little bit if you want." Sylvie pulled off her gear and offered it to Doris.
"No. No way." Doris waved her hands. "I'm not getting in any water that could possibly have a shark lurking below. I grew up in Minnesota on a completely shark-free lake, and the only water I'm swimming in other than pools."
"Sharks are harmless." Marge rolled her eyes. "Literally millions of people a year swim in the ocean and, what, like two get turned into shark food annually?"
"Four," Sylvie answered. "Worldwide, sharks kill about four people a year. Your chance of getting killed by a shark is about one in three million."
We all looked at her, perplexed.
She shrunk a little. "Sorry. I Googled it before we booked the excursion. I'm not going to lie, I'm pretty scared of sharks, too, and the data helped me feel better."
Marge jutted a thumb at Sylvie. "Well, there ya go. Encyclopedia Britannica here says it's safe."
"I mean, they do attack more people than that, but most aren't fatal," Sylvie added.
"See!" Doris pointed at the water outside Cozumel behind us. "I could be attacked!"
Marge scoffed. "So, you lose an arm. Big whoop. You can live with one arm. Don't worry, we'll wipe your ass for you."
As Marge's taunting grin grew, Doris swatted the air at her. "Oh, Marge! You're disgusting. And I don't want to live without an arm!"
"Just swim next to Marge," I interjected. "She's slow. You can push her in front of the shark and make a clean getaway."
Marge's mouth dropped. "Isthatwhy you stayed right next to me all day? You were gonna push me in front of a shark?"
I just shrugged. "Well, can you blame me? I was hoping if one came, it would bite off those hairy ass legs of yours so I don't have to stare at them anymore."
Marge narrowed her eyes at me, and a sinister smile lifted her lips. "You just wait. If we see any real sharks, I'm gonna shove your bony ass right at it. You may not have enough meat on your bones for a meal, but it can use your legs as toothpicks." While I gasped and touched my enviable stems, she turned back to Doris. "I'm just saying, I think sharks are amazing, and I would love to see one up close. You're not in any real danger of getting eaten by a shark. They are terribly misunderstood creatures. In fact, you're probably far more likely to get mauled by a cougar ... like this one."
She pointed at me, and everyone burst into laughter.
"You know." Sylvie put her finger on her chin. "Now that you say that, I find it interesting that we're on day eight of our cruise, and in fact, Alice hasn't cougared at all. If I'm not mistaken, when she's not with us, she's spendingallher time with Captain Alejandro." She said his name in a sultry Spanish accent.
Three sets of penetrating eyes all turned to stare at me, and I felt a girlish flush creeping up my cheeks.
"I do not," I lied.
They weren't wrong. In the eight days since I'd gone to dinner with Alejandro, we'd been nearly inseparable every moment he wasn't captaining the ship. I spent my days with the widows exploring the beautiful ports along our voyage and lounging by the pool. But after the sun went down and Alejandro got his scheduled time off, I slipped away from my widows and into his arms.
Tender touches. Passionate kisses. Endless laughter. Each moment spent together was pure magic. He showed me all the secret treasures at each port—a magical world hidden off the beaten path he knew so well. Being so well-traveled, he seemed to have discovered every nook and cranny of the places he'd been, and I loved how excited he was to share them with me.
"Oh, come on. We know exactly where you're going when you sneak away. ToAlejandro."Sylvie closed her eyes and started making kissy faces. The other widows burst into laughter.
"More like, 'Bow chica wow wow!'" Marge sing-songed, thrusting her hips in an awkward motion.
I scrunched my face. "Don't ever thrust your crotch like that again, Marge. I'm going to have nightmares. It's gonna be worse than the nightmares those legs of yours are giving me." I pointed to the hairy legs still sporting the naked stripe down the middle of one.
"Don't change the subject." Marge sat her ass back down. "You've been cagey about talking about Alejandro ever since that first date. What gives, huh? Come on, Alice. Spill! What the hell is going on with you two?"
"Nothing." I straightened taller. "He's just showing me some hidden spots around the ports."
"It's not nothing." Sylvie narrowed her eyes in a challenge. "You haven't been yourself since you met him. I don't think I've seen you so much as ogle one single man. Not even the hot bartender by the pool who always flirts with you. And that man is ..." She stopped and bit her fist. "I mean, come on, Alice. Before Alejandro, you'd have climbed him like a tree half a dozen times already and horrified us when you overshared about whatever strange, kinky sex you were having. What is going on? Have you fallen for Alejandro?"
