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We pulled them out, then after quickly scanning them, we rushed down the jetway to the plane. The flight attendant pointed us to our seats in first class, and one by one, we collapsed into the soft, oversized leather chairs. Before I’d met Alice, I’d never even peeked my head inside the luxurious first class of a plane, but since she insisted on traveling in style, we always flew first class on our adventures. And now that I’d flown that way, I hated to admit I couldn’t imagine going back to being squished like sardines in coach ... even for this short connecting flight to the long one awaiting us that would take us to Australia. The Widows were in for an even bigger treat when they saw what I splurged for on that flight.
“Cripes. We made it,” I breathed out.
“We made it,” Sylvie repeated as she slouched beside me. “That was close.”
“I can’t believe we made it! I almost went to jail!” Doris whimpered. “I didn’t know I couldn’t say ...”
“Out of your vocabulary,” I warned her sternly, stopping her from finishing that sentence. “That word is no longer in your vocabulary. Forget that word exists, Doris.”
Doris pinched her lips tight. “Sorry. It’s out of my vocabulary.”
Sylvie gestured to all of us, and with a big smile, she said, “We’re all here. We’re safe. No one is in jail, and we’re officially heading off on the start of our new Wilder Widows adventure.”
“I can’t believe we’re going to Australia,” Doris said. “How wonderful.”
“And jumping out of a plane. I cannot wait!” I bounced in my seat.
“Maybe don’t put that kind of juju out into the world while we’re in a plane. We don’t want to jump out of a planeyet.”Sylvie arched an eyebrow.
I nodded in agreement. “Yeah. Good point. But man, I am so excited. This is gonna be an amazing adventure.”
“I’m so glad to be sharing it with you all.” Doris sighed sweetly.
“Me too,” Sylvie agreed.
We all looked at Alice.
She shrugged. “I’ll be happy to share in this adventure once I have some freaking vodka. Where the hell is the flight attendant?” She looked over her shoulder at the busy woman preparing everything for the flight.
“Do you want some fudge to tide you over?” Doris asked, gesturing to her purse.
Alice glanced at the purse that had gotten us in so much trouble. “Does it have vodka in it?”
Doris shook her head. “No. No vodka. Just sugar, butter, milk—”
Alice stopped her with a raised hand. “Then, no thanks. That fudge is the reason we didn’t have time to unwind at the bar.” Alice arched an eyebrow, and Doris shrunk.
“It’s good, though,” she said.
“I want vodka,” Alice countered. “You know I need a little something to take the edge off when I fly.”
“What you want is these compression socks.” I reached into my bag and pulled out four pairs of tall, stretchy socks.
“What the hell is that?” Alice recoiled.
“Oh! Compression socks!” Sylvie reached over and grabbed a pair. “That’s a great idea! Thanks, Marge!”
“Don’t need my best ladies getting blood clots. We’ve got this flight for an hour, then a two-hour wait for our flight to Australia, then a long flight there. By the time we’re done, we’ll be traveling for over twenty-four hours. We need protection.”
“Oh! They give these to you after surgery!” Doris grabbed a pair, and I threw a pair into Alice’s face.
She swatted them onto her lap like they were a pesky fly. “Never. I’m not wearing ghastly compression socks like an old lady.”
“You are an old lady,” Sylvie said as she kicked off her shoes and started pulling on the socks. “Marge is right. Unless you want to get a big blood clot in those beautiful legs, you’d better put these babies on.”
Alice lifted them up and looked at them like they were made of dog poop, then looked over at us as we struggled to pull ours up.
“These are so tight! I can barely get it over my calf!” Doris struggled, and then her hand slipped, and she elbowed me in the ribs.
