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“I’m ready. I just don’t want my kids to feel insecure.”
“And I get that and I respect it. I want to be your friend, and I want to be a friend to your kids. But this is a small town, and if we try to see each other and keep it from your kids, it will come back to bite us in the ass. They’ll hear about it. I don’t want that.”
He stared out the windshield, his jaw set in a tense line. “I don’t want to lose you. Not to Keller or any other man.”
We’d arrived at The Barn and he pulled up next to my car, putting his truck in park.
“Look,” I said, turning to face him. “I don’t know what the future holds. I’ve decided to tell Keller that if he needs an answer immediately on the job offer, the answer is no. I need more time to explore my options. I’ve been thinking about what you said about there being more than just two job choices for me. I don’t have the bandwidth to start my own restaurant because that would take as much time or more than The Moose takes now. But I’m thinking. And while I think, I’m staying in the Beard.” I took his hand and squeezed it. “So be my friend. Move into your new house and get going with your new job. Let’s see where things stand in a few months.”
He nodded, his expression forlorn.
“So you’re still considering working for Keller?”
I shrugged. “Maybe? I don’t know. I never thought I’d work anywhere but The Moose, so I’m trying to take my time thinking things through.”
“Okay.”
“Hey,” I said softly. “Last night was amazing. Let’s not feel like we need an answer for every question right now.”
He cupped my cheek in his palm and we both leaned in, meeting in the middle for a kiss. I didn’t know if I was feeling my own longing not to get out of the truck and leave or his longing for me to stay. But, like all good things, our magical night together had to come to an end.
“Enjoy your breakfast,” I said softly.
“Don’t work too hard.”
I smiled at him as I got out of the truck, trying to make my expression light, though my heart was heavy.
I wouldn’t be a woman who put pressure on a single dad to give me more than he was ready for. It wasn’t how I was made. But deep down inside, I could admit to myself that I’d never wanted more with any man as much as I wanted it with Holt.
CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE
Holt
“Up and at ’em!” I flipped the light switch and both kids groaned. “It’s moving day, offspring! Let’s get going.”
Spencer, true to form, sat up and put his glasses on. Marley, also true to form, pulled the covers over her head, refusing to get up.
“I guess we’ll have to find some other kid to give Marley’s room to,” I said loudly.
“Can we?” Spencer asked hopefully.
I gave him a look.
“I don’t want to leave,” Marley said, her voice muffled by the covers.
“You have a cool new canopy bed at the house, peanut. The movers set it up yesterday. You’re gonna love it.”
“I like it here.”
I sat down at the end of her bed. “You want to stay in these two rooms at The Moose forever?”
“Yes.”
“We like it here, Dad,” Spencer said. “We get to see Shea and all our other friends all the time. We’ll never see them when we live in the house.”
His mention of Shea shook me because I had the same worry. No more run-ins or evenings on the lawn. The closer the two of us got, the more I missed her when we went several days at a time without seeing each other.
“People come and go from here, guys,” I said. “The friends you have who are staying here this summer won’t be here forever, either.”
