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There was a tiny voice in the back of my head, whispering that I should listen to my brother. He’d known Preston a lot longer—and better—than I had, so he’d seen all the sides to his friend, not just the ones I’d seen in the few months we’d been together.
But . . . he wasn’t the same boy he’d been when I’d had a crush on him. He’d grown and changed, and if Colin couldn’t see that, it was because he was too busy being biased and feeling betrayed over something he had no business worrying about.
Preston and I were consenting adults.
I had no idea what kind of expression was on my face, but it compelled him to keep talking. “I’m not trying to be an asshole—”
“Bullshit,” Preston snapped.
“—I’m trying to protect you.” Colin rested a hand on the counter and leaned forward, perhaps wanting to give his statement more weight. “I know it doesn’t seem like it, but I want what’s best for you.”
His words made everything inside me stop and go cold.
“Are you serious?” My heart was made of lead, dragging me down. “You sound exactly like Mom and Dad.”
He reared back as if I’d slapped him, and the horrified realization made his eyes go wide. He’d suffered under their rule, so he should have known better.
“All my life,” there was so much fire burning inside me, the words tasted ashy, “people keep telling me they want what’s best for me. But not a single person, not one fucking person in this world, except for Preston, has ever asked me what I want.”
The atmosphere shifted, freezing all the feelings of hurt and betrayal between the men in place.
“Is it because what I want doesn’t matter?” I asked. “I don’t get a say in it?”
Colin looked pained. “Come on, Syd. Of course you do.”
“Yeah?” I gestured to the man standing beside me, the one who looked like he had so much he wanted to say but was doing his best to let me speak. “Well, I want him. Deal with it.”
I had so much conviction, he couldn’t argue with it.
Instead, his shoulders slumped with a sadness I didn’t understand. “Shit. Is it too late? Are you already in love with him?”
I despised the dread in his voice, and it got me so worked up, I answered without thinking. “Yes.”
The single word left my lips like a bullet.
It struck Colin before traveling on to embed itself in Preston’s center. He jolted and stiffened awkwardly, making it clear how uncomfortable he was hearing I was in love with him. And his reaction? It didn’t go unnoticed by my brother.
Oh, god. What had I done?
You told the truth.
I had—but I’d done it without thinking about the consequences. I hadn’t built up the courage to tell Preston yet, and I had no idea if he felt the same, or if telling him I loved him was going to send him running.
I stared at the man I loved, and my heart stopped beating because his gaze refused to meet mine. It was laser focused on my brother.
“And what about you?” Colin’s tone was harsh and demanding. “You love her too?”
Shit, I couldn’t breathe. Everything was tight with apprehension, and the longer Preston went without doing or saying anything, the more painful it became. My face gradually heated to a million degrees, and each second that ticked by, my embarrassment increased tenfold.
On some level, I understood that I’d stunned him speechless, but his silence created room for doubt. For the tiny voice to grow louder about listening to the warning Colin had given me.
Oh, my god. What if he was right?
What if Preston was going to use me until he’d had his fill, and then leave? In the beginning, he’d been clear the thing between us was only about sex. Maybe I’d gotten good at being a bad girl because I’d broken his only rule and fallen for him.
Preston’s non-answer was answer enough for my brother. Colin’s tone turned patronizing. “Yeah, I thought so.”
Finally, Preston seemed to come back to life. “Just wait a minute.”
