AllFreeNovel
Share Us
“She took a bullet to the heart,” Mikhail says through gritted teeth. “She bled out before we could get her to a doctor.”
I’m broken. Raw. I’ve never known pain like this before. Whatever inkling of strength I had left in my body suddenly leaves me. I fall to my knees, entirely numb.
Sandra’s gone.
And it’s all my fault.
Before my brothers have a chance to pick me up and place me on my feet, the loud click of a gun’s safety flicking off screams in my ear. The sharp bite of cold metal presses against my brow. Mikhail Antonov has a gun to my head and I couldn’t care less.
“Drop it!” Leo shouts, pulling out his own weapon.
He starts a domino effect. Now that he has his gun raised, all of Mikhail’s men do the same. My brothers react in kind, guns pointing at guns pointing at guns. We’re in a thirty-person stand-off. If this keeps up, someone’s going to end up dead.
A small part of my soul hopes it’s me.
“I should have killed you sooner,” Mikhail seethes. “If I had, my daughter wouldn’t be…”
I lean forward against the tip of his gun. Unafraid.Willing. If he puts a bullet between my eyes, I’ll consider it a mercy. I’d much rather be dead and unfeeling than deal with the agonizing, shredding pain of knowing Sandra’s gone.
“Do it,” I plead. The words come out of my mouth by themselves. My brain doesn’t even register the thought, it just happens. “Please.”
Mikhail’s lip curls up into a sneer. “What did you think was going to happen? All this fooling around behind our backs—”
“We weren’t fooling around.” My throat is torn to shreds. “I love her.”
Mikhail huffs in derision, tossing the gun onto the ground before me. The clatter of the metal on the pavement is somehow a thousand times louder in my distress. “You love her? I don’t believe you.”
“Please—”
“Do us all a favor and do it yourself.”
I pick up his gun with a shaky hand. A revolver. I check the chamber—one bullet. His message is loud and clear. My life for Sandra’s.
Mikhail doesn’t even grace me with a final look. He waves a hand toward his men, the simple gesture signaling for them all to stand down. There won’t be a fight here, and Lord knows there’s certainly no fight left in me.
I stare at the gun in quiet contemplation, vaguely aware of my brothers calling out to me. My thoughts sink into a place I didn’t know existed, somewhere dark and inescapable. All my guilt mixes with all my anger. Everything about this is confusing and cruel. It brings me back to a time when I learned my mother had passed. I’m suddenly transported to a time when I was but a boy, alone and afraid and furious at the world for letting it happen.
There are no words to describe my agony. There is no conceivable amount of time that will allow me to heal. If Sandra isn’t here, then what the fuck is the point?
“Brother.”
Samuil and Roman are on either side of me, grasping me by the arms to hoist me onto my feet. Leo looks at me with a mixture of disappointment and pity. It’s not a good feeling—knowing I’ve let my little brothers down. It’s my job to be someone they can look up to.
Now, I’m nothing but a heartbroken failure.
“Let’s go,” Roman says. “You got your answer.”
* * *
I have no memory of sliding into the back seat, wedged between Samuil and Damien. I don’t recall the drive back into Moscow. The police are everywhere, but they pay us no mind, our taxi camouflage working its usual magic. I have no memory of stepping into my cold, dark apartment, nor do I remember getting into the shower to wash off all the blood and grime.
There’s no telling how long I remain under the shower’s spray. I crank up the temperature until the water’s borderline scalding in the hopes it’ll help me feel something. It doesn’t.
My brothers are still here by the time I finally find the strength to dry off and dress. They mill about my kitchen, talking quietly amongst themselves. All traces of conversation cease the second I step into view. Leo, Samuil, Roman, and Damien watch me, good little soldiers waiting for orders that won’t come.
“Tell us what to do,” Damien says. “What do we do now?”
“This is a grand opportunity for us,” Leo replies. “With most of our enemies dead or in jail, their territory is up for grabs. We can move in now and claim it all with next to no resistance. It’s perfect.”
