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When I blinked at her, she was peeling off the light trench she always wore to hide the gun I knew she carried in a holster at the back of her pants.
“Kokou.”
“Let’s do something about that headache.” Her voice cracked with emotions.
“We can’t make love just because I have a headache.”
“Are you saying you haven’t been thinking about it?” Kokou wanted to know. “Did I read the way you look at me wrong?”
I shook my head and instantly regretted it. The movement made it feel as if my brain was bouncing around in my skull and that made me wince.
“You didn’t read it wrong.” I admitted. “And I feel like an idiot saying no to your offer. But Abeke, we kissed, and you regretted it. You can’t get any more intimate than making love. Plus I—”
“I didn’t regret the kiss.” Kokou turned her back to me and sat on the floor. “I was ashamed I’d allowed it to happen. I’m used to being in control. But I—just know that if we made love, I wouldn’t regret it.”
I pushed my feet out of the sofa and eased across the space to sit on the center table to tip her chin up with a finger. For an eternity, all I did was allow my eyes to trail her face—over her lips down to the tip of her nose and up to her eyes.
“My God, I want you.” I admitted. “But I can’t use the excuse of a migraine to have you. If we’re ever going to make love, I want it to be because you’ve thought about it and decided you can’t live without it.”
“The ego on you.”
“No.” I released her chin. “No ego. That’s the only reason you’re to give yourself to a man—not because he wants to. Not because he’s shows interest, but because you can’t resist and make the decision to award him with the prize between your thighs.”
She hung her head again.
“I’ve never seen a queen do that before.”
“Do what?”
“Hang her head.” I paused. “I’m going to take a nap.”
“You don’t think any less of me because of what I tried to—”
Smiling, I caressed her cheeks, dropped a kiss on the tip of her nose and straightened my back.
“Less of you?” I asked. “Having a woman want me is one of my biggest turn-ons. But there is something about the wayyouwant me that makes me lose my breath.”
Leaving her, I climbed the stairs to my bedroom and crawled in to snuggle into the pillows. My eyes were closed before I was even settled.
I’d just turned down the most beautiful woman I’d ever seen—the most beautiful woman on earth.
What the hell was the matter with me?
“I’m an idiot.” I sighed. “A complete idiot.”
The time ticked me silently as the world hummed on its hingers. Everything ages as my head pulsed with the silent symphony of life. With my eyes closed, it seemed to lessen the pressure inside my skull.
I afforded myself a few deep breaths that filled my lungs—paused, holding the breath—then pushed it out my mouth.
“Daniel?”
For a moment, I thought I was imagining the softness of Kokou’s voice. She couldn’t be there, and she’d never say my name with so much passion.
It had to have been inside my head.
“Daniel, are you awake?”
I grunted, rolled over and looked toward the door.
