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His fans and the paparazzi surround him, camera flashes going off inches from his face despite his security team trying to back them up. Bordeaux doesn’t move, doesn’t even flinch. He stays in the spot I left him in, unmoving, his eyes deadlocked on mine.
My attempt to fight back tears fails me, and I struggle to get a deep breath as I turn away from him. Despite the growing distance between us as I step into the shop, I swear I hear our hearts collectively break for the last time.
Forty-Eight
Isla
Six Months Later…
Kilig (n.) the rush or inexplicable joy
one feels after seeing or experiencing something romantic.
___________
I’m crouching in the most uncomfortable bush in all of Chicago, sticks and leaves up my ass as I try to keep perfectly still.
My oversized, dark sunglasses fall down my face and I nearly tip over and out of the damn bush trying to get them back up and over my eyes to be as covert as possible.
“Shit,” I mutter, adjusting myself in the prickly bush and getting back into position just as Dani, Veronica’s girlfriend, gets down on one knee in the middle of Millennium Park.
I snap pictures incessantly as Veronica starts pretty-ugly crying, both hands flying to her mouth in complete and total shock at Dani’s gesture. Tears sting my eyes before rolling down my cheeks. Veronica looks gorgeous in a white sundress, her dark curls cascading down her back, the spirals bouncing as she goes from a standing position to down on both knees in front of where Dani is kneeling.
I continue to snap photo after photo, not trusting myself that I’ve gotten the one yet. Dani cups Veronica’s head in her hands and brings her mouth to hers, planting a kiss on her plum-colored lips.
Dani is wearing black jeans, without holes in them—which is quite a feat for her. She typically chooses a grungier look. Her dark hair is in her signature pixie cut style, and she’s gorgeous. Almost as gorgeous as my stunning sister, who by the way, is now straddling Dani in the middle of Millennium Park, waving her hand around in the air at anyone who passes them, shouting, “I’m engaged!”
Dani looks over at me, laughing, and I finally barrel out of the bush and toward Veronica. “You’re engaged!” I yell at the top of my lungs, my phone still in my hand and prickly things from the bush stuck to my ass.
Veronica’s attention snaps toward me as I run like a wild banshee and crash into the both of them.
“Congratulations!” I say through my tears, looking from Veronica to Dani and back again. “I’m so happy for you both.”
We start swiping through the ten billion photos I took, and Veronica makes me heart her favorites so I can send them to her later.
The three of us are looking at wedding save-the-date options because Veronica has absolutely no chill when I realize how different our lives look. But not just different in a sense that she’s engaged and I’m alone, but different as in this time two years ago, I was engaged and she was single.
It’s so strange how quickly life can totally uproot your entire destiny—or what you think is your destiny.
The old, familiar and achingly annoying lump grows in my throat at the thought of what my life could be like right now had I only made one different choice.
I could be with Manuel if I decided to take him back. We might even be pregnant or have a child by now. But I chose differently.
I could be with Bordeaux.
The lump twists, growing in size.
I could be with Bordeaux, and I could be the happiest I’d ever been. But I chose differently.
I avert my attention back to Veronica who is ‘ooh’ing’ and ‘aah’ing’ over a gorgeous black and silver save-the-date option. I try to force my sadness away just as my phone vibrates in my back pocket.
I slide it out of my jeans and smile when I see Declan’s name flash across my screen.
Declan: Here is your reminder about our listening party at Iconic tonight. You’ll be there right? XO
Shit.
I totally forgot about the listening party Declan invited me to for Reckless Desires. She told me about it a couple of weeks ago, right when the band finally broke free from Hellfire Records. She was on an uncontrollable high when she called, her happiness floating through the phone as she spoke rapidly.
