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“If you’re putting me on the spot, you get to join me there,” I retorted.
Sean grumbled the whole way over to the piano. “What are you going to play?” he asked.
“‘Just the Way You Are,’” I replied. “I thought about playing ‘Scenes from an Italian Restaurant,’ but I don’t remember the whole thing.”
I closed my eyes when I sat on the piano bench in front of the glossy ebony Steinway concert grand. I remembered when Mr. Whitaker bought it five years ago to bribe me into coming to the hotel more often. I really had loved the old guy, even if he had been a bit pushy. The fact that he’d left his hotel to Sean and me still caught me by surprise sometimes.
I waited for a moment, trying to recall the music I wanted to play. My fingers trembled when I ran them over the keys before finally giving in to the familiar feel. The first notes were hesitant until I relaxed and let myself remember.
When I started singing, Sean joined me, bringing me back to the times we would sing together when we were younger. Even though Sean was four years older than me, he’d never made me feel like he didn’t want me around. I’d gotten into shows and musicals because he had done it first. And he always told me how proud he was of me, bragging to anyone who would listen about how talented I was. So here I was, playing the piano in front of a premier concert pianist because my big brother asked me to.
I glanced up at Sean, who was standing in the curve of the piano, and saw him looking straight at Jeremy as he sang. His expression was so full of love that it brought tears to my eyes. I wanted that someday. I wanted someone to love, who loved me back the way Jeremy so obviously loved Sean.
My thoughts drifted to Marco, and I shook my head. I was barking up the wrong tree with that one. He was never going to love me like that. I needed to keep reminding myself of that and let what we had be what it was—a casual no-strings hookup.
There was enthusiastic applause when we finished, and Jeremy came up and pulled Sean into his arms. I smiled because it was really good to see my brother so happy. I almost pulled out my phone to call Marco, to tell him I’d finally been able to play the piano. I stopped myself in time. That was something you shared with a boyfriend, not a fuck buddy.
I was about to return to my seat to escape the lovefest when Sean grabbed me and dragged me into a group hug. He kissed the side of my head and said, “It’s so good to see you back to your old self.”
I smiled. “I’m getting there.”
Jeremy stepped away and said, “You are very good.”
I felt myself blushing. “Thank you.”
“Told you,” Sean said triumphantly. He wrapped his arm around my shoulders. “So, what do you have going on this weekend?”
“Nothing tomorrow,” I replied. “The VNA is closed. Saturday, I have self-defense training with Marco.”
“What’s up with that?” Sean asked. “I’ve been meaning to ask. I mean, why do you need self-defense?”
I looked him in the eye and gave him the answer Marco and I had decided on. “I’m a gay man in a country where a good number of people still think it’s okay to beat the crap out of me. Marco said it would help me feel empowered.”
Sean crossed his arms. “I could teach you self-defense.”
I rolled my eyes. “Are you actually pouting right now? And, no, you can’t teach me self-defense. You worry too much about hurting me.”
My brother glowered at me. “Marco hurts you?”
I threw up my hands. “No! The man is an expert in close-quarters hand-to-hand combat. He knows how to make it seem real without hurting me.”
Jeremy put his hand on Sean’s shoulder. “Sean, it’s okay. Marco would never hurt Liam.”
Not physically, at least, I thought. “I’m fine. It’s good for me. You worry too much.”
Sean huffed a dissatisfied breath. “Yeah, all right. I get it.”
In an effort to divert the conversation from Marco and self-defense training, I said, “Tell me more about your house hunting. Where are you looking?”
Sean launched into a rant about rental prices and locations while Jeremy smiled indulgently. I let out a sigh of relief. Sean would lose his mind if he knew the real reason I was learning self-defense.
21
Liam
The dining room in the Moonlight Inn was festively decorated for the upcoming holidays. There was a beautifully decorated Christmas tree in one corner and a menorah on a small table covered with a white linen tablecloth. I was once again seated at the piano, this time playing Christmas carols.
It was Saturday morning, and I was supposed to have had a training session with Marco that would have likely ended in sex at his place. Unfortunately, his team got called overseas to rescue some corporate big-wig from kidnappers. The corporation had their own medic, so they didn’t need me. I sighed. I could have stayed home, but I hadn’t wanted to hang around my mother’s house alone, so here I was.
