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And then, she stands straighter. Her arms pull back, and I realize that she’s preparing to hurl the fireball forward.
“I wish I knew how to believe you. Please know, I really do wish I could.”
I bend my legs to jump for it, but I can tell it’s too late. This is the moment. This is the moment she decides what her future will be. The only thing I can do is watch and hope she makes the right decision.
Prince Zalith stares at her. His eyes widen as her hands finally come together behind the swirling mass of all of her anger and pain brought together into one ball of deadly flame.
26
LORELAI
This is it,I think, as I grit my teeth and brace myself for the recoil. If I don’t do it now, I won’t do it ever. Here we go.
I bring my hands around to the back of the fireball, tense all my muscles…
And I dissipate the fire. Slyth catches himself in the middle of trying to jump into the path. Zalith lets out his breath in an audible gasp.
I drop onto my knees and finally let the tears I’ve been holding back out. The office is calm, except for the sound of me crying. It’s the hardest I’ve cried in… I don’t actually remember the last time I cried like this. It’s as if all of the anger in me has turned to sadness, and it’s all trying to flow from my eyes.
“I’m sorry,” I mutter. “I’m so sorry.”
Slyth drops down next to me, wraps his arms around me, and pulls me close. He’s warm and gentle, and despite myself, I relax into him.
“It’s okay,” he tells me. With one hand, he strokes my back up and down. “It’s all over. You’ll be okay.”
“Don’t lie to me,” I whisper.
“What do you mean?” he asks, continuing to pull me close and rhythmically stroke my back.
Zalith has returned to his seat, clearly shaken. But it can’t be too much longer before he summons his guards and tells them what I did, can it?
I believe that Slyth loves me. I believe he wants to forgive me. But I’m not stupid. I just threatened Zalith’s life, and he’s the one who’s in charge. I should be trying to run away and fight my way out. But I can’t. All I can do is lean into Slyth’s smooth, soft body and weep.
That’s alright. If there’s one thing I can do well, it’s accept my fate. At least I won’t have killed a man I didn’t want to. That’s worth something.
“I’m sorry,” I repeat. “I ruined everything.”
“That’s not true,” he says. “You haven’t ruined anything. I love you. And I have you.”
But for how long? How long until the Prince has his revenge?
“It’s alright,” I say, this time to Zalith, not Slyth. “You can do whatever you have to. I made the right choice in the end. Even if it was too late.”
Zalith looks at Slyth. “What do you say, Slyth?”
Slyth returns his gaze but doesn’t rise. “You have the authority to override me if you want to. But you know what my request will be.”
“Yes, I do,” Zalith agrees. “It’s not a small request. You must know that.”
“I do. That’s why I’m making it.”
Zalith stands up and approaches. The two of them whisper to each other, and I don’t bother trying to make out what they’re saying. It doesn’t really matter anymore. None of it does. This is the path I chose. I have to accept it now.
I may die, but at least I’ll die for something. When it all came down to it, I chose to be better than the people who hurt me. I chose to have principles even when they had none.
That’s something to be proud of. And if Slyth is right, and Zalith really does make things better for humans in the Kingdom of Lodra, then my death will be worth it. Maybe I’ve done something for them after all, even if it was only conquering myself.
There’s a pause in the whispered conversation above me. Zalith is making his final decision. I decide that I want to say something.
