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“Derek? It’s Sloan Farmer…listen, I wonder if you do something for me…?”
***
Norah kissed her mother’s temple softly and crept out of the room. Her mother was even more distant than ever, talking about Norah’s father as if he was still alive and young and coming to court her. Norah had let her talk, fascinated about her parent’s life before she had come along. They had been older first-time parents, late in their forties and she always felt unconnected to that part of their lives. This evening, her mother had been reliving their honeymoon and the first home they’d had.
“Of course,” said her mother blithely, “Our families were at us to start a family. I kept telling them, neither of us wants children, but of course, they never believed us. But we showed them.”
The hurt that ripped through Norah at her mother’s words made her stomach clenched and she winced, only smoothing out her expression when her mother looked at her. It was like the disease had wiped Norah’s existence from the planet.
Now, walking out of the care facility, Norah let a few tears come. The doctor she’d talked to earlier had said the lucid periods were becoming fewer and fewer. The mother she’d loved and been loved by was gone.
Norah walked quickly to the cab she’d ordered, needing now to get to Jay, get away from the feeling that she no longer mattered. She didn’t notice the dark sedan with the blacked out windows parked across the street.
***
Jay saw her reddened eyes but said nothing, just took her in his arms, bending his head to kiss her. “Hey, beautiful.”
She sank into the kiss and then laughed as he lifted her off her feet and spun her around.
“I ordered pizza,” he hitched her legs around him and walked toward the bedroom, “for midnight…this is why I love the city.”
“Midnight, huh?” She was smiling genuinely now, wrapping her arms around his neck.
He dropped her onto the bed and peeled his t-shirt off in one smooth move. Norah reached up to run her hands over his taut stomach. “Now, this is worth coming home to,” she said then flushed when she realized what she had said. Jay put her hand over his heart, covering it with his large, warm palm. “Damn right,” he said softly, “welcome home, beautiful.”
Norah stood and kissed him. He was right but it wasn’t the apartment that felt like home, it was him. She felt so safe in his arms, so protected, so cared for. There was a deep need in her that, until Jay, she didn’t know was there.
They made love slowly, exploring the other’s body as if it was the first time and later, when the pizza came, they ate in bed, watching reruns of Friends and sharing jokes. They fell asleep in each other’s arms just before 2 a.m. sated and happy.
***
“My mother has Alzheimer’s. That’s where I am Tuesday and Thursday evenings. She doesn’t recognize me anymore.” It was out and she drew in a deep breath and waited.
Jay put his cup of coffee down and reached across the breakfast bar to take her hand. “I’m sorry, Norah, that’s….damn, there’s no words for how awful it must have been for you.”
Norah nodded, the knot of tension in her still taut. Jay gave her a small smile. “Is that what you were afraid to tell me?”
She nodded. “I don’t know why. I would still rather keep it between you and I. I guess I didn’t want it to be a factor on how you felt about me or think of me.”
Jay looked confused. “Why would it?”
She shrugged in defeat. “Like I said, I don’t know.” She was silent for a moment. “I guess I was afraid that you’d feel sorry for me.”
“Norah Quinn, do you have such little faith in me? You seem to think that I’ve been somehow doing you a favor all this time. I totally have Machiavellian reasons for everything — I’m in love with you.”
That floored her and she gaped at him. The easy way he just dropped it into the conversation. Something that big. “Jay…”
“I love you.”
“Please, Jay…”
“I love you.”
His green eyes were twinkling merrily and suddenly she felt the weight lift from her body and she started smiling through her tears. “Oh, god, Jay, I love you so much…”
He pulled her into his arms and kissed so passionately she thought she might pass out.
They were both very, very late for work.
