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“I’ll try. When he comes back, I’ll try to be honest.” She gave him a small smile, and she knew that he was right. She needed to be honest with Kamal. He deserved that much. No matter how much it hurt, she would have to tell him. She would have to tell him about the baby. And she would have to tell him how she felt about him.
* * *
“Where is she?” Kamal shouted when he burst into the palace. It was well after midnight, but she wasn’t in the suite. His heart hammered in his chest as he searched for her. “Where is she?”
“What in the world?” His mother walked in and wrapped the tighter around her. “Kamal. What are you doing here? Why are you shouting?”
His chest heaved as he shook his head. “She’s gone? She left me? Why didn’t anyone call me and tell me?”
His mother cocked his head. “She’s hasn’t slept well these days. I think she walked out in the gardens and by the lake sometimes when she can’t sleep.”
“Thanks.” He turned and raced out of the palace. The moon light filtered along everything as he moved as quickly as he could. Deep into the gardens, he found her leaning against the tree and staring at the water. Stopping short, he could only stare. His entire body reacted to her. It wasn’t just carnal desire. His body knew her. Seeing her was like coming home. How could he have not known before?
“Jada,” he said softly. Her whole body tensed, so while she didn’t turn around, he knew that she could hear him. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry that I hurt you. I’m so sorry that it had to take kissing another woman for me to realize what I wanted. I don’t deserve your forgiveness, so I didn’t come here asking for it. I came here to tell you that I’m an idiot.”
She turned around and stared at him. “You’re not the only one who’s an idiot,” she said with a soft smile. “I’ve spent all this time trying to be the perfect wife, and somewhere along the way, I lost myself. I haven’t been honest with you, Kamal. I’m not the woman who waits for her husband to come home. I’m not the woman who slaves over the stove for her husband. I’m the woman who stands by his side and works with him. I’m the woman who argues for what I believe in and tells you when I think you’re wrong. I hate shopping. Shopping is the absolutely worse, and I don’t love the simpering cocktail parties and I hate the party dresses and I loathe waiting by the phone for you to call.”
Everything inside him melted as he stepped towards her. “Good. I hate women who love shopping and simpering cocktail parties. And while I love it when you’re dressed up because you look beautiful, I’ll hate it if you hate it. And you don’t have to wait by the phone because I want you by my side. I know that you don’t love me, Jada. And I can work with that, but I love you, and I’m not going to give up until you’re comfortable with the fact that I love you.”
“Oh, Kamal.” She reached up and grabbed his hand.
“I’ll never ask you to love me. That’s not something that you can ask someone, but I want you to be okay that your husband loves you. I need you to know that I don’t love Sara. I spent a long time thinking that I loved Sara, but I don’t. And I need you to be okay that I don’t Sara. Is that okay?”
“You’ve said okay quite a few times, Kamal. Can you let me talk now?”
He blinked and nodded. “Of course. Okay. Sorry. I do keep saying okay.”
“I lied, Kamal. I do love you. I’ve been terrified to tell you, but I’m trying something new called honesty. And honestly, I love you.” She smiled at him and squeezed his hand. “Are you okay with that?”
With a whoop, he reached down and swooped her up and twirled her around. She shrieked with laughter, and he bent down and kissed her. This time he wasn’t kissing the woman he found beautiful or his lover or the wife that he’d married out of obligation. He kissed the woman that he loved, and it changed everything for him.
“Oh,” she staggered. “Wow.”
“Wow indeed,” he murmured. “Everything is going to be different now, darling. Everything is going to be wow from now on.”
Jada wrapped her arm around his neck and buried her face in his chest. “I have something that I need to tell you.”
“What?”
“I’m pregnant.” She gazed at him, and he saw the uncertainty in her eyes. He took a deep breath and gently lowered them both to the ground. He couldn’t even begin to tell her how he felt, so he tried to show her as he loved her. Hovering over her, he gently pressed his hand to her abdomen and kissed her.
Sliding her hands through his hair, she whimpered softly. “Kamal? Is that how you feel?”
“This is how I feel. I want to hold you in my arms for the rest of my life, and I want to hold our child. This is our family, Jada. I couldn’t be happier.” Once again, he reached down to taste her.
“Kamal, if you don’t stop, I’m not going to want you to stop.”
He gave her a wicked grin. “I’m not going to stop.”
“Kama! What if someone comes out? What about the guards!”
Reaching down, he slowly lifted the hem of her shirt so he could touch her bare skin. It had been so long since he’d touched her, and now he couldn’t get enough of her. “If anyone comes out to see us, I guarantee they’re not going to say a word. And I can’t wait, Jada. I need to feel you around me.”
She giggled and lifted so he could strip the rest of her shirt off. She wasn’t wearing anything underneath, and he bent down to kiss her erect nipples. A whisper of a moan escaped her lips, and he growled softly. It had been so long since he’d heard that. He had no idea how much he’d missed it.
“Now,” she said as she arched her hips and shimmied out of her pants. “I need you right now.”
“My pleasure.” He stripped out of his clothes and leaned over her and pressed is body against her. Letting his hand roam, he explored as he tasted her, and she wrapped her legs around him. Before he knew what was happening, she rolled them over and straddled him.
