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A flare of excitement lit Gael’s brown eyes before he turned away to hide it. “Either way, it doesn’t really matter. I just thought I’d bring it to you.” He set the book on my desk.
“Thank you. I’ll give it to him tonight.”
Gael nodded, opened his mouth like he was going to say something, but then closed it again. He turned and went for the door, stopping with his back to me and said, “Thanks, Spencer…for everything or whatever,” then walked out.
I couldn’t hold back my smile, and the first person I thought of to talk to about it was Corbin, not just because Gael had brought him the book, but because of what he’d said to me too. Somehow, I knew Corbin would get it more than anyone else.
Corbin annoyingly filled my thoughts the rest of the day. It was almost time to get off work when my cell buzzed. My eyes darted toward it, wondering if it would be the man who had twisted my head, but it was Morgan.
“Thank God,” I said to him when I answered.
Morgan chuckled. “I don’t often hear that when I call someone. Want to grab dinner?”
Had Corbin eaten today? If so, how much? “Yes. Fuck yes.” I needed to get my mind off him.
We chose a little hole-in-the-wall, queer restaurant. They served a bit of everything, in a relaxed environment, the walls covered in photos of queer people and articles about queer history and things like that.
Morgan was already there when I arrived. He waved me over.
“I need a drink,” I said.
“Work stuff?”
Usually, it was work stuff, but that was before I’d come down with a case of Corbin Brain. Oh look, that was another form of CB. We were cuddle buddies, but he also left me with Corbin Brain, and had since the first time I met him.
“No.”
“Is everything okay?” Morgan’s brows pinched together in concern.
“Remember Annoying Neighbor?” I asked, having told him a few stories about Corbin before.
“The really beautiful guy you seem to hate for no reason? Yes, I remember him.”
Before I could continue, the waiter showed up. We each ordered a margarita, chips and salsa for an appetizer, and chicken street tacos. It was what we always got when we came here.
The second the waiter was gone, I said, “Yes. God yes. He really is gorgeous.” The thing most people didn’t see was that Corbin was even more beautiful on the inside than the outside. I hadn’t seen it until these past few weeks. I would still never forgive myself for judging him so harshly, and I wished everyone could see what I did in him.
“That sounded very…what’s the word?…swoony. Looks like I need an update.”
“It wasn’t swoony.” Was it? Corbin Brain strikes again. But I wanted to talk to someone about it, and Morgan was the person I discussed stuff with, so there was no reason to stall. “What I didn’t tell you about him was that I’ve met him before.”
The waiter brought our drinks and appetizer while I told Morgan about the night I’d met Corbin in college. From there I went into my long-lasting grudge against him, which honestly, wasn’t normal for me. I didn’t tend to hold grudges.
“And now?” Morgan asked.
Now…now I wasn’t sure what to say about him. It was confusing and exciting and, frankly, annoying too. “Now we’re friends.”
“A friend you fuck?”
“Umm…no?”
Morgan gave a deep, husky laugh. “Why do you sound unsure about that? It’s an easy question.”
Because explaining to him exactly what we did, and doing it without sharing any of Corbin’s private struggles, was difficult. “A friend I cuddle.”
Morgan’s dark brows rose. “Excuse me, what?”
“You heard me. We…cuddle. He sleeps at my house, in my bed. I haven’t even kissed the guy, but we sleep together and snuggle on my couch. I know, I know. It’s weird. I can’t tell you why we do it, but it’s something I started for him, and now I…” Now I liked it. And I missed it. I missed Corbin.
“Now it sounds like it’s for you too and you like this guy.”
Ding! Ding! Ding! We had a winner. “Not like him like him. I just…sorta like him.”
Morgan laughed again, just as the waiter brought our food. He set each plate in front of us, asked if we needed anything else, and when we said no, disappeared again.
“You either like him or you don’t. All this weird code-word crush-talk is bullshit. You’re interested in him. What’s the big deal?”
The big deal was I was supposed to hate him, but I’d never really hated him. And we were an odd couple. I worried about him and wanted to protect and take care of him, but I didn’t know how to do that or if I should want to. Corbin said he was looking for a boyfriend, but I wasn’t sure that was something he really wanted. He just didn’t want to be alone, and the thought of getting myself entangled with another man who could easily walk away from me was…really fucking scary. I’d thought DJ and I were in it together forever, and if that couldn’t last, it sure as shit wouldn’t with someone like Corbin.
