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Jesus, I’d been so fucking emotional lately. I didn’t know what was wrong with me, and it was driving me crazy, so I decided to do what I did best and play the game. “Have you guys ever noticed that my nickname fits me more than yours do?”
“I have no idea what you’re talking about,” Declan replied.
“But is that anything new?” Marcus asked. “Us not knowing what Corbin is talking about.”
“Yikes…sorry I’m too intelligent for the three of you, but back to my nickname, The Charmer, I’m just saying I’m pretty fucking charming. I was sitting around thinking about that earlier, how incredibly charismatic I am. Some might say I’m absolutely captivating.”
“Oh, did you get up to the c’s in the dictionary?” Parker teased.
“I remember when you were the nice one.” I winked. “I just think I have the best nickname, and I’m much more charming than the rest of you are with your silly little nicknames.”
I was talking out my ass, of course, but I couldn’t think of anything else to say.
“All our nicknames fit us,” Declan replied.
“Much more so before you fell in love—Oh shit. Do you think if I give the boyfriend thing a try, I’ll become less charming? Actually, never mind. That’s not possible.”
“Is that still a plan? You trying to find a boyfriend?” Parker questioned.
“I think so. Though what are my responsibilities if I have an official BF?” I joked.
Marcus ruffled my hair. “Jesus, kid.”
“Every relationship is different,” Parker said. “You and your boyfriend have to decide what works for you.”
“Okay, so maybe I’ll give it a test drive? Give it a go for a week or two and see what happens?”
My friends all laughed, but it was Declan who spoke. “Because that’s something everyone will want to sign up for. Do you want to be my test boyfriend for a week?”
“Sounds reasonable to me. Oh my God! This idea is golden! I could start like a test-boyfriend gig, not just for myself, but for others. I’m a genius!”
“You’re not taking applications or looking for a test boyfriend,” Marcus told me.
“Um…thanks for your opinion, Daddy Marcus, but you’re not the boss of me.”
“You’re not doing it,” he reiterated.
“Yes, I am.”
“No, you’re not.”
“Yes I am.”
“Um…maybe we should have this discussion later?” Declan said. “But for the record, I’m on Team Marcus.”
“Of course you are.” I crossed my arms and pretended to pout. “Help me out here, Park.”
“Sorry…I have to agree with them. But that’s just because I love you and you’ll get a bunch of weirdos who have no interest in the real Corb other than being on The Vers podcast’s ‘Try a Boyfriend’ segment or whatever it is you’re suggesting. Believe me, I’ve been on a lot of bad dates, and I’d like to spare you that trouble.”
“That,” Marcus concurred.
“Agreed,” Declan added.
I rolled my eyes. “You guys are no fun, but also, I love you too.”
As I knew he would, Marcus wrapped his arm around me, pulled me close, and kept me tucked into his body. I loved it here. Not just with him, but with any of the Beach Bums. I couldn’t pretend that being closer to Marcus didn’t put me at ease more than anyone else, though. Not because of any romantic feelings people thought I harbored for Marcus, which I didn’t. It was because the bond we shared went deeper than that. Marcus said that the first time he felt what it was like to be loved was when we came into his life. His parents loved him, and he’d always had them both in his life, but they hadn’t shown affection easily and had been more about work than anything else. Things were getting better in that regard lately, and I was so happy for my friend.
And I felt the same—my three friends were the first people who’d made me feel loved on that level I was thinking about earlier, where I was completely accepted despite my shenanigans. Marcus was the first person who told me I was beautiful. When I was a kid and everyone made fun of my looks or my weight, Marcus saw a best friend, and when he told me I was beautiful, I believed him. Now, it didn’t matter how many men I fucked or how many thirsty comments I got on posts, telling me I was hot or what they wanted to do to me. Those weren’t real. I tried really hard to take those words to heart so I could feel good about myself, but it never worked, not for more than a few minutes anyway.
We continued the show with me wrapped up in Marcus, joking and laughing the way the group of us always did when we were together.
When Marcus ended the recording, he kissed my temple. “You good?”
“I am.” I shook my head. “Ugh, Daddy is so annoying.” I sat up and pulled away, Park and Dec chuckling. “How’s the wedding planning going?” I asked Parker.
