AllFreeNovel
Share Us
As the days roll by and he makes no effort to contact rental agencies, I suggest moving into a student dorm, but he says it will be better if I stay with Ryan and Celeste. The prospect makes me very happy. I’ve seen too little of my nephew. Bradfield had colic when he was little, and he’s a bad sleeper. My brother and his wife are always tired, therefore visiting us even less than before.
I’m not sleeping well either. I can’t remember the last time I had eight hours of uninterrupted rest. It’s not only the workload of school and the prospect of going to university that keep me up. It’s the approach of my eighteenth birthday. The closer the day gets, the more apprehensive I become. I have no reason to believe Angelo will show up. His text and voice messages eventually dried up around June.
His silence can mean many things. Maybe he realized I was serious about ignoring his messages. Maybe he was just messing with my head and got tired of the game. Or maybe he met someone and lost interest in tormenting me.
I wish it was that easy for me to move on. I’ve never had the courage to show interest in another guy again. Every time I consider making advances, my throat closes up and I feel an anxiety attack coming on. Rather than making a fool of myself, I always turn away from potentially flirtatious situations. Things will go better in Cape Town. It’s a big city. It’s not Great Brak River where I’m constantly reminded of Angelo. Cape Town will be a new start. Everything will change there.
Yet I don’t believe that one hundred percent. If I did, I would’ve long since chucked Angelo’s ring in the trash. Instead, it’s a permanent fixture on my thumb, a constant reminder of his promise. What it symbolizes dictates my behavior and shrouds my life in fear. I don’t understand Angelo’s motives. I don’t know why he plays this sick game of possession. Only, deep down, I do know the answer. There can only be one reason why Angelo still wants to haunt me.
He wants all my firsts.
The thought is too disconcerting to entertain. Whenever it pops into my mind, I brush it away. The game is over. It has to be. I keep on telling myself that he’s moved on and found himself another target, but there’s only one way to know for sure.
I’ll find out on my birthday.
All my classmates have already turned eighteen. My parents sent me to school one year early, hence, I’m the last one to celebrate the big milestone. The parents tried to outdo themselves with the coming-of-age parties they organized at fancy venues and on yachts in Mossel Bay. I begged my parents not to have another cocktail party at home. I won’t be able to live through another night of oysters and champagne with the family while Colin entertains us on my underused piano.
It’s Ryan’s idea to throw a party at the casino nightclub in Mossel Bay. Isn’t everyone eager to show their ID cards for the first time at a club? It’s not what I would’ve chosen myself, but Ryan means well. He hasn’t said anything, but after Bradfield’s birth, he’s started to notice my withdrawal from my friends and the world. My apathetic brother is more perceptive than what I give him credit for.
With some coaxing from Ryan, my parents agree. As the casino is a thirty-minute drive from home and the road is dark at night, their only condition is that we sleep over at the casino hotel. The fact that we’re of legal age and, as per the tradition, some alcohol will be consumed, also plays a role in their decision. They’re not taking risks with drinking and driving.
My mom says they’re too old to accompany a group of youngsters to a nightclub and that she’ll feel out of place. The lucky task of babysitting falls on Ryan and Celeste. Celeste will leave Bradfield with her parents for the weekend. Ryan and Celeste are calling him Brad now that he’s reached the milestone of walking. My sister-in-law has strange rituals.
Mattie comes home to take me shopping for a dress. Too nervous to be excited about anything, I let her bully me into buying a slick golden dress with spaghetti straps that she pairs with matching heels. It’s way too formal and smart for me, but Mattie swears the dress makes me look sophisticated and classy.
I invite Colin, May, and a few guys and girls from town. May can’t make it because she’s visiting her grandparents in Port Elizabeth. When the big day arrives, Ryan and Celeste fetch me. Colin catches a ride with us. He’s chatting to Ryan about his upcoming semester and subject choices at university while I’m staring through the window and biting my nails.
