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“You know what, you little shit.”
That only made Kai laugh. He really was a little shit.
“What’s the problem?” Kai asked, his eyes twinkling as he swirled his tongue around the spoon again before putting it back in the empty bowl in front of him.
“You’re frustrating and annoying and a pain in my ass.”
“Not yet,” Kai said with a cheeky wink.
Steel groaned. “And we’re back to annoying.”
“Aww. You love me,” Kai said in a baby voice that had Steel itching to reach for his gun.
“It’s no wonder you’ve got a hit out on you. Actually, I’m surprised it hasn’t happened a lot earlier.”
That seemed to sour Kai’s mood a bit. His smile dropped and he looked thoughtful for a moment. Just long enough for Steel to worry that he might be having a stroke.
“I’m too good at my job,” Kai mumbled, eyes avoiding Steel’s gaze.
Steel felt a chill run down his spine and instinctually leaned back in his seat, away from Kai.
He jerked when Kai roughly pushed his chair back and hurried out of the room.
What… had just happened?
He slowly got up and walked in the direction Kai had headed. He found him outside, arms resting on top of the porch railing. His head was dropped forward, and even though Steel couldn’t see his face, Kai looked defeated. He’d never seen him like that. Kai could be serious. Even if he was mostly goofy and had that annoying ability to turn anything you said into something sexual.
This was different. There was just an energy of pure defeat around him.
Steel moved closer but didn’t say anything. He knew Kai was aware of his presence. The man wouldn’t have lasted long in his line of work if he wasn’t hyper-aware of his surroundings at all times. It was kind of sad, actually. When had Kai ever really relaxed? Had he ever been able to come home and drop onto the couch to watch a movie without that niggling thought that danger might be lurking somewhere in the back of his mind? Had he ever been with someone where he hadn’t had to consider that they might try to kill him at any point?
“I’d grown cold,” Kai said. “Passive. I’d stopped caring.”
Steel had a lump in his throat as he watched Kai turn around. Kai leaned back against the rail, hands holding onto it on either side of him. His eyes… Steel didn’t know what he was looking into. It was like a storm of emotions.
“I just followed orders,” Kai said, his voice soft and filled with what almost sounded like regret.
Steel moved before he realized what he was doing. He walked closer, stopping at one of the pillars to rest his shoulder against it.
Kai was opening up to him and even if he very likely wouldn’t like what he had to say, a part of him knew he had to hear it.
“I was sent to kill Elijah. Nic—Uh—Hawk’s husband.”
Steel sucked in a surprised breath.
Kai nodded, then said, “Hawk and I worked together until he quit, and I hadn’t seen him for years. When I came for Elijah, Hawk was there, of course. We fought. At least until we realized who we were fighting. We sorted it all out and kept Elijah safe. Or, rather, he kept himself safe.”
Kai shook his head. “Doesn’t matter. What I’m trying to say is that seeing those two together made me realize just how little my life is worth.”
Kai looked so sad. He wanted to wrap his arms around him and yet, he didn’t.
“I made a deal with my boss. I don’t kill innocents. Not anymore.”
That lump in Steel’s throat grew bigger. He knew Kai was telling him he was trying to do better, but all he could think about was that ‘not anymore’ because it meant Kai had killed innocent people before. Probably a lot of them.
Kai blew out a breath.
“I realized your brother and Trina were innocent. That’s why I didn’t kill them. Either Trina’s husband lied to my boss, or my boss lied to me.”
