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Nash runs both of his hands down my body, feeling every inch, “Tell me and I’ll remove the cuffs. Why did you send the text message, Ivy?”
* * *
Nash
To say Ivy is pissing me off is putting it mildly. At first, I thought maybe she sent that text message to fuck with me. Now, I can clearly see it was far more than that. I want to know why she sent it far more than I want to punish her. I pull out of her, climb off the bed, and remove her cuffs.
“Get dressed.”
Grabbing my boxers, I pull them on as she gets dressed with fumbling fingers.
“Are you kicking me out?” She says in nearly a whisper.
Glancing at her, I can’t understand her pained expression, “Is that what you want?”
She shakes her head, and whispers, “No.”
“Why did you send me the text message?”
Ivy sits on the bed, twisting the sheets between her fingers. She’s terrified, but I don’t understand why.
“Ivy, I asked you a question.”
She gazes at me with teary eyes, “Please, don’t make me. I don’t want to talk about this.”
Climbing on the bed beside her, I open my arms, “Come here.”
I tuck her into my side, “Let me explain something to you. You’re mine to take care of, Princess. I can’t do that if I don’t know what has you so upset. This only works if you can communicate with me.”
She speaks in a voice so low it’s barely above a whisper, “I started thinking about things. Did you only want me because you can’t have me? Or because I was a virgin? Did you use me? I have feelings I don’t quite understand. I thought it would be best for me to get out now while I can still protect my heart.”
Cupping her cheeks, I tilt her head back and look into her eyes, “Princess, let me say this as gently as I’m capable of. I’m not letting you go. You’re mine. Did I only want you because you are the one woman I should stay away from? No. Did I only want you because you were a virgin? No. Do I like that I’m the only man to ever fuck that pretty pussy? Yes.”
Her breathing picks up, and I notice her chest rising and falling rapidly, “I want every part of you, Princess, not just your body. I want your joy, the sadness, that fucking pain that controls you. I want it all. Every ounce of it. I will not allow you to push me away. You wanted this so badly, now you have it.”
A tear rolls down her cheek, “I tried to get you to use drugs. How can you stand to be in the same room as me?”
“My beautiful Princess, that was the drugs. Drugs change the way a person behaves. Addiction makes them do vile things for their next fix. Another thing a lot of people don’t understand is they want everyone to be high with them. If I had joined in and used, I couldn’t say anything about you doing it.”
Ivy bites her lip before responding, “I wanted to destroy you. I needed you gone before you spilled my dirty secret. I’m so sorry.”
“I know you are. I forgive you.”
She expels a loud sigh as if the weight of the world has been lifted from her shoulders. I don’t really believe forgiveness was needed. I get it—the cycle of the drugs. I knew what she was doing. I also know how important forgiveness is when your actions are eating you alive.
CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE
IVY
Ispent most of the night with Nash but had to go back to the house at five in the morning to avoid drama with my dad. Now I’m getting ready to go for coffee with The Tribe. We used to meet up every week or two, but nobody wanted to be around me when I was popping pills like they were candy. I can’t say that I blame them. I met Sarah at a book convention. She introduced me to Amanda, Danielle, and Jenny.
When I walk into PCH Coffee Company, I spot them sitting at a table near the coffee bar. I pull out a seat and say my hello’s. I’m sitting beside Amanda, while Sarah and Jenny sit across from us, and Danielle is on Amanda’s other side. Of course, most of the conversation is book related. All four of them do a lot in the book world to help independent authors. Amanda is a PA for several amazing smutty authors.
“What have you been up to, Ivy?” Amanda asks.
Sarah giggles, nearly giving away my secret. She’s the only one that knows. I’d like to keep it that way because with four women the odds are at least one is going to think I’m disgusting for fucking my adopted brother.
“I started painting again.”
