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“Cockblocking Ambrose, I’m gonna murder him…” The door opens and Zane Andrews, you know famous, gorgeous guy we saw earlier strolls right on in like he owns the place.
He drops his phone and sunglasses on the kitchen counter and stretches his arms over his head.
He’s literally wearing no shirt, only low-slung ripped jeans that show his black Calvin Klein underwear and he has a weird smile on his face.
“Bro, you high?” Quinn asks. “Also, why? Just why?”
Zane frowns. “No, I just made a neighborhood decision.”
“What’s that?” I whisper under my breath.
“Hey there.” He winks a blue eye in my direction. “Anyway, neighborhood decision…” He walks around the couch, then plops down next to me. “Basically, the kid shit his pants again, the wife is gone, the nanny is present because my beautiful wife had to go out of town and when I saw an escape from shit, I took it, and then I told everyone else—also yes, parenting isn’t for the weak and I haven’t had time off in years from not only my work but from wiping asses, so don’t judge me with your judgmental eyes.”
I hold up my hands. “No judgement over the shit.”
He peers around me. “I think she’s a keeper.”
Quinn sighs. “Okay, so what’s this about?”
“We’re having a barbeque, might play some pong.” He sighs. “Or maybe even nap, actually, damn, can you imagine how nice it would be to just… lay down?”
“Do you not… er, sleep?” I ask.
His left eye twitches.
Quinn leans in and whispers, “I think that was a no.”
“Anyway!” Zane jumps up. “The life of a rockstar and full-time dad is exhausting and I’m starting work on the new album next week so I think I deserve some time out, oh shit, you guys watching Pretty Woman?” He proceeds to jump between us on the couch—still shirtless mind you while another knock sounds at the door. “It’s open!”
“It’s not your house,” Quinn grumbles under his breath.
Zane scoffs. “Actually, it’s not your house either, besides, did you not hear the explanation? No shitty diapers. I get to sit here.”
“Shirtless.” I add, staring at his chest.
He points at me. “Very perceptive of you and while I did used to go around with no shirt on, the only reason I pulled mine off today was because it had chocolate on it—was touch and go there for a minute there when I thought it was poop.”
Quinn and I frown at each other.
I speak up first. “How did you know it was chocolate?”
Zane shrugs. “Oh, I tasted it.” The door opens. “Hey man!”
A guy pops his head in, then pulls out a giant case of beer. He’s vaguely familiar and I’m just about to place him when Quinn curses under his breath. “You brought Jamie?”
“Heard that,” Jamie says, his voice has a slight British accent.
I’m still frowning when it dawns on me. I’m not used to seeing him in real life, only on TV.
I raise my hand.
“Awww.” Jamie grins. “She’s adorable, we’re keeping her, right?”
“She’s not a pet!’ Quinn yells.
“How many famous cousins do you have again?” I say in a weak voice. “So I can mentally and emotionally prepare for more shock?”
I’m already sick.
