AllFreeNovel
Share Us
A man in the row behind ours rises, his eyes on me.
The woman next to him comes to her feet.
Slowly, and then all at once, everyone stands.
Theyallstand.
And they’re all looking at me.
I swallow. And look back.
Feeling the weight of the moment deep in my soul.
Dominic lowers his arm from my shoulders, sliding his hand down the length of my arm until his fingers are twined with mine.
I squeeze his fingers, hard, feeling like I might disintegrate if I don’t have something to hold on to.
Then, with the entire room standing, Dom turns us back around and guides me into my seat.
Without him, I’d collapse onto the hard wooden bench. But, still clinging to his hand, I manage to sink down onto it.
There’s a collective sound of creaking wood as the entire congregation sits after we do.
A moment later, a priest appears at the front of the church, but I don’t catch a single word he says.
The emotions in this place…
The feelings in this place…
Still clutching Dom’s hand with my left, I reach my right hand up to rub at my chest.
I’ve never experienced anything like this before. This sense offamily.
Of acceptance.
There are sniffles. A few open cries. The sounds of babies. And still a sense of solemn peace.
This is so different from the other funerals I’ve been to.
And I don’t want to think about those. But I can’t stop myself.
“He is survived by his wife, Barbara, and their two children, King and Aspen.”
I press against my chest harder.
My mother’s fingers pinching me.
Siblings I didn’t know I had glaring at me. Ignoring me.
I squeeze Dom’s fingers.
My first true feelings of being unwanted.
I try to forget.
Sitting alone in a small chapel in Florida. My dry eyes staring at the silver urn on an unadorned stool at the front of the room.
Another tear escapes the corner of my eye.
