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I let out a breath. “To save me from myself.”
“What do you mean?”
“I have a thing for … men I’ve worked for. A … boss thing.” I sound like such a psycho right now.
“I don’t understand.”
“I’ve repeatedly been attracted to my bosses. You just heard the whole story about Monty,” I say.
“But what does Dave have to do with that?”
“Dave happened because that night you brought Shane over to talk to Nadia, the time I … fell off my chair,” I mumble the last part, not wanting to remember my clumsiness.
“Yeah?”
“I’d had some liquid courage that night and I was going to flirt with you, but then you said you were dating and so I made him up. And then I just kept him around to remind me that I should never flirt with my boss. It’s just an all-around bad idea. But you’re … you, and even though I know it’s a bad idea, I feel this crazy attraction …” I stop myself from going further by sucking my lips between my teeth. I’m just going to stop talking now, and possibly forever.
“So, Dave isn’t real?”
“Mm-hmm,” I say, still sucking in my lips. My vow of silence is beginning as of right now.
“And you made him up because you’re attracted to me?”
I don’t say anything because of my vow, and also because I’ll embarrass myself further if I do. What I need to do is just slip out of Grayson’s lap, hobble over to whatever is in the bushes, and let it put me out of my misery. Coincidentally, I haven’t heard any noises in a while, so it might be gone.
But before I can figure out how to get out of his lap with my hurt ankle, Grayson leans in and places his hands gently on my face, one on each side. This close, I can feel his heart beating in his chest, or maybe it’s my rapid pulse I can feel as he moves in even closer and presses his lips to mine.
“Grayson,” I say breathlessly, when he pulls back ever so slightly, our noses almost touching, our breaths mingling. I wrap my hands around his forearms. Not to push him away, but to keep him there.
I lean in this time, closing the distance between us. I press my lips to his, softly, and then I linger there. Letting him know I want this. I want this so badly; I might explode with all the feelings running through me right now.
He takes my cue, and his lips begin to slowly move over mine, like the loveliest of caresses. It’s tender and sweet at first, like he wants to take his time. But that only lasts for so long before the intensity changes. He tilts my head to the side so he can deepen the kiss, his tongue brushing just along my bottom lip, and I feel like I’m on fire.
I open my mouth to give him more access. Our kisses feel hungrier now, more passionate. Grayson kisses me like he wants to keep me, like he never wants to let me go. He moves his hands so one is woven in my hair and the other is at the back of my neck, and mine are around him, feeling his strong back muscles as I pull myself into him, not wanting any space between us.
I’m fully making out with my boss in the middle of the Hawaiian rainforest in the dark of night, and I can’t bring myself to think about all the reasons I shouldn’t be—I just want to keep doing this for basically the rest of my life. I could die up here, from a wild hog attack, or who knows what, and I can say with full confidence that I couldn’t care less. I would have no regrets.
Sometime later we come up for air, my lips swollen and my body completely alive.
“You kissed me,” I say. I don’t know why. It’s the first thing that comes out of my mouth.
Our faces are close together. I’m still in his lap, my hands are on his shoulders, and his arms are wrapped around me.
“You kissed me back,” Grayson says.
“Why did you kiss me?”
“Because I’ve wanted to since the first time I met you.”
“You did not,” I say with a laugh. I lean in and lay my head on his shoulder, and his hold on me tightens.
“I did,” he insists.
“So, this isn’t a trauma bonding thing,” I say.
“What?”
“Like, you know, we’re both lost in the rainforest. We have no idea if we’ll survive.”
